Friday, June 29, 2007


So... Its Friday... and for once I have to stay substancially sober... because my wife has decided to go ahead and start having some pretty nice contractions.

Oh fun.

No fear. We've still got cigars to smoke! Speaking of those.... Flor De Selva!! Go find them. If these aren't the best cigars I've ever smoked... they are right up there. I've smoked cuban cohibas... I've smoked the best of the best... and honestly... these little honduras they're damned sure in the hunt.

I'm smoking the corona tonight.. they call it Fino I believe. Light cigar... silky... easy even burn... easy smoke... but still... complicated. Its a joy. Honestly. So raise a glass to WhiskeyGirl! She's the sweetheart that got them for me.

God bless ya darlin'!

Speaking of gifts... Spacebunny and WhiskeyGirl are not the only ones to send ol' Nate a package recently.

The other day I opened the mailbox to find a curiosity from none other than Luke himself. I opened the box and low and behold... A Bianchi M-12 holster! This is a badass holster... its part of a modular system that can be used to carry your weapon roughly 14 different ways. Everything from left-had belt, to right hand cross draw... to shoulder rigs... to a tactical thigh rig. Its even got a silent spring closure. Its new... so it fits my PT-101 a little snug... but it fits the steyr like they were made for each other.

Carry holster? No... Not so much. Duty holster? Hell yeah. Maybe the best you can get.

Thank ya Luke. I love this thing.

Now... guns... smokes... what am I missing here?

Oh yeah... Booze. Though I suppose I did make excuses... I suppose I'll have to put off the comparison. I'm gonna sip a little Bookers and see who stumbles by.

Check in y'all.
Regalo Inatteso

Spacebunny Bello! Grazie molto! Speriamo di restituire il favore. Siete nelle nostre preghiere. Il dio benedice la famiglia di Vox Day.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

June 28, 1997

It was the third most exhausting day of my life.

I was 23-years-old... I woke up on the floor of my apartment... with about 7 other guys layin' around... in various stages of hung-over. It was about 7am I guess... which for this particular Saturday... was late.

First things first... shower... shave... far more primping than is otherwise acceptable for a male... but on days like this we make exceptions. Everybody but my buddy Josh went their separate ways. Josh was my wingman today. He'd never leave my side. Thank God.

Things started off calm enough considering... we made it over to mom and dad's house to see some of the family that had come down for the festivities. There was breakfast of some form had... its all a blur to be honest. Then it was time for Josh and I to go pack and head into Nashville.

The plan was to check into the hotel on the way to the church... easy enough... except.. as always... we were running late. The situation didn't get dire of course. We had plenty of time after we ran up to the room and dropped the luggage off. Well... we had plenty of time... until Josh's car decided it was a good time to not start.


I have to be at the Church in like... an hour... and my best man's car won't start. Thankfully a fella at the hotel was able to jump it... and we were on our way... oh but the fun was just getting started.

We arrive at the church late... not insanely late... but late enough that I greeted several guests while I was still wearing shorts and a t-shirt. ugh. I would say that we had no reason to worry... except that Mom and Dad still hadn't arrived.. and they had all the tuxes.

All of them.

I love weddings.

Anyway... roughly 40 minutes before the ceremony was supposed to start they showed up with the tuxes and we could finally suit up. This was an event unto itself. I mean.. we had like 8 guys in this one little room trying to change into tuxes... and most of these guys have only worn a tux once in their whole life.

You can imagine.. my brothers... my friends... dressin' up in penguin suits in hurry.

It was a spectacle.

The whole thing degenerated into a perpetual game of grabass... punctuated by JAC strutting around claim to be the "prettiest". The Father of the Bride was speechless. It was in fact this little episode that moved him to pay me a great compliment... one that is still referenced by my kin folk to this day... He told his daughter after the wedding, "Nathan's a good man. He was just raised rough."

Raised rough.

I still like the sound of that. I suppose I'm getting a bit ahead of myself... now where was I? Ah yes... getting dressed. It was during this mad dash of a dressing that we noted that Dr Who's dad was carrying.

Now I don't know about y'all... but in the south its unwise for one side of a wedding party to be armed whilst the other ain't... so we did the proper thing... and shortly before the music started... we armed ourselves.

I guess that about gets us to the wedding... The music finally started... I tell ya'll... ya can't beat a good Methodist wedding. From the time the music started... to the time the last person was escorted out of the sanctuary... was a total of 16 minutes.

Beat that!

Anyway... I could go on for days about all the things that went wrong...

The day before the wedding the photographer called and cancelled... he was sick. The organist never showed up for rehearsal and played the wrong music. The prick played "here comes the bride" instead of what we requested... which was Wagner. Jerk.

Anyway... One thing I remember about the ceremony was looking at her. When our eyes met.. it was just... With us... I don't know... it was more like the whole time we were sharing an inside joke. It was definitely a, "can you believe this?" sort of experience. This wasn't some whirlwind romance... this was my best friend... and we'd been together for almost 5 years at this point.

I'm sure every wedding has a thousand stories that go along with it... and I've left out more than I've included... I mean... just having all the families there in one church... especially a Methodist church... it was just... I don't know. Most of the day Julie and I were half expecting world war three to break out.

See.. ya think of weddings as a joining of two families. In fact.. there are 4. Bride's mom's family. Bride's dad's family. Groom's mom's family. Groom's dad's family. On top of all this... you have all the friends.

In our case... this was a volatile mixture.

My dad's family is die-hard catholic. His mom has told me and my brothers on several occasions that we're going to Hell because we aren't Catholic.

Contrast this with Julie's Paternal Grandmother... who told me I wasn't a Christian because I wasn't Church of Christ.

Then on my maternal mother's side ya have the Fire and Brimstone Baptists... which mix very well with Julie's mom and immediate family... who at the time were charismatic.

And it wasn't just religion... Julie's family is huge on academics... Both her parents are teachers.. and her paternal grandfather was chair of the mathematics department at a decent sized university. That was fine with my dad's family... who are all various forms of entrepreneurs and engineers... but then... my mom's family... are largely a bunch of good God-fearin' rednecks.

This is even more strange when you consider that my mother is as prim and proper as the day is long... and my dad is a redneck truckdriver. Something is bass-ackwards there... but yet again... I digress.

So on top of this culture clash... Let's say that there was added pressure... in that someone's mother wasn't exactly supportive of this little enterprise. In fact at first she declined to attend at all.

Believe it or not... in spite of all this... there was no bloodshed. There were a few awkward moments... but those are just something we can all laugh about now.

I'll tell ya this though... I've never been happier to see a long white limo in my whole life... It offered escape from the chaos... rest... and finally a chance to be my wife in peace.

We were exhausted... but she was so excited. I hadn't yet told her where we were going on our honeymoon... so on the way to the hotel I explained that we'd be getting up at 4am to fly to the Caribbean.

Ya know looking back on it... its funny how that day sort of sums up our whole marriage. With us... it always seems like there is some kind of chaos around us. Family and friends stirring up various troubles and drama... people thinking we're nuts for the things we do together... for the way we organize our life... for the decisions we make and the timing of those choices... the pressures and screw ups of all kinds from the outside world... but at the center all that, almost isolated from it, ya find my wife and I... content as we can be... sharing that same old inside joke.

On this... the tenth anniversary of our wedding... I'd like to thank God for insulation.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Bad Joke Wednesday!

- What washes up on very small beaches?


- Why did the traffic light turn red?

You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street!

- Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?

Because then it would be a foot!

- A blonde walks into a doctor's office. She gets in the room with the doctor and says, "Doc, I hurt all over." The doctor is really confused. He says, "What do you mean, you hurt all over?" The blonde says, "I'll show you."She then touches herself on her leg. "OW!!! I hurt there." Then she touches her earlobe. "OW!!!!!! I hurt there too!" Then she touches her hair. "OW!!!!! EVEN MY HAIR HURTS!" So the doctor sits back and thinks on it for 5 min. Then he says, "Tell me, is blonde your natural hair color?" The blonde says "Yes, why?"The doctor says,

"Well, you got a broken finger..."

- A man walked into a pharmacy and up to the young lady pharmacist."Do you sell Viagra?", he enquires."Yes, we do." replies the pharmacist."Does it really work?", asks the man."Yes.", she answered."And can I get it over the counter?" he continues.

"Probably... if you took two of them!"

And one ol' Classic....

- Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients on the operating table.The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded."

The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth surgeon chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers...those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would."

But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed: "You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, and no spine, and the head and butt are interchangeable."

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Diversity Training

One of the more amusing experiences I've had whilst perusing the blogosphere came when I stumbled onto a local lefty blob... I mean... blog. The girl was fretting over her siblings chirens.. because you see... they apparently we're making fun of some Mexicans.

The girl was ringing her hands... and fretting... "its starting" she worried. "Is there anything that can be done?"

She was worried of course because the diversity curriculum just hadn't taken. I thought about linking so you could see for yourself... but do you really want to? Nah.. I didn't think so.

But let's examine this shall we? I mean what is a good priestess of diversification supposed to do? Well... let's see... How about we start by examining what's already being done.

It starts in daycare. Kids are punished for describing other kids in anyway that may refer to race. When a teacher see's a crying child she may ask, "What happened?" the blubbering child will then say something like... "that boy hit me!"

"Which boy?"

"That black boy over there."

The teacher... then confronted with a whole new problem deals with it swiftly. The boy who was hit is punished for "seeing colors", and the other boy isn't punished at all. Think I'm making it up? Think again. This scenario came straight from the day care next to the mortgage company I used to help run. This is brainwashing... and its very powerful. Unfortunately the results are exactly the opposite of those intended.

Fresh from daycare these kids now move on to school where their education in the theology of diversity is stepped up even further. Any mention of race is dealt with severely when the authorities are made aware. Blacks are treated different than whites... but no one dares speak of it. PC propaganda is rammed down their throats 7 hours a day.

And what does it teach them?

It teaches them that adults are stupid.

They know their school is 80% white and 20% black... and they know that their basketball team is somehow 90% black... and the football team is pretty close to that too. They also know that their Calculus class has 30 kids... but only 2 of them are black... and one of them is getting a D. They know that their AP physics and AP chemistry classes have no blacks at all.

Kids aren't stupid. Kids simply observe. Their brains haven't been deluded by ideology yet. But they have by now learned to regurgitate the required party line.

But back to our liberal friend... What is she to do? The question she's really asking of course is, what is left to do?

The answer?

Nothing. There is nothing left to do. Political Correctness is forced upon these kids hours upon hours each day. It just does work for the vast majority of them. Why? Because kids aren't stupid. Kids observe.

All it does is convince kids that authority figures are idiots and cannot be trusted. It actually fosters authority complexes and emboldens the racism that already exists in everyone.

Every once in a while the liberals are confronted with a small dose of reality... invariably it scares the shit out of them.

Monday, June 25, 2007

Crime Has A Color

*** WARNING *** If you believe in Unicorns, the Tooth Fairy, or Diversity, the following isn't for you.

The following facts come directly from the 2005 FBI Uniform Crime Report, if you don't like them, I suggest you take it up with them.

• Of the nearly 770,000 violent interracial crimes committed every year involving blacks and whites, blacks commit 85 percent and whites commit 15 percent.

• Blacks commit more violent crime against whites than against blacks. Forty-five percent of their victims are white, 43 percent are black, and 10 percent are Hispanic. When whites commit violent crime, only three percent of their victims are black.

• Blacks are an estimated 39 times more likely to commit a violent crime against a white than vice versa, and 136 times more likely to commit robbery.

• Blacks are 2.25 times more likely to commit officially-designated hate crimes against whites than vice versa.

• Blacks are seven times more likely than people of other races to commit murder, and eight times more likely to commit robbery.

• When blacks commit crimes of violence, they are nearly three times more likely than non-blacks to use a gun, and more than twice as likely to use a knife.

• Hispanics commit violent crimes at roughly three times the white rate, and Asians commit violent crimes at about one quarter the white rate.

• The single best indicator of violent crime levels in an area is the percentage of the population that is black and Hispanic.

I know I know... this isn't what you want to hear. Its not what you want to believe. I mean... it can't be true can it? You know lots of black people and they never raped a white woman! And what about all those hollywood movies about how white southerners hate blacks?

Nah.. You're right... we're all better off if no one brings this stuff up. We'll just stick our fingers in our ears, close our eyes, and wish it all away.

Brainwashing and cooersion keeps the lid on this issue for now... since the MM won't dare mention it... and all good folk know that discussing something like this at work will cost you your job. Ahhh....

But the times they are a changin'. MM doesn't have the monopoly on information anymore.

Friday, June 22, 2007


I have a confession.... this will likely be the first ATF where I admit to drinking... ***gasp*** a mixed drink.

Gin and Tonic.

Hell is freezin' over.

So anyway... DrWho's on call... so I'm makin' out with... ***AHEM*** I mean!!!! Makin' do with Joy. Anyway... sometimes we all slum... and of course.. I'm referring to the Gin.


My OTHER beloved Sister-in-Law... sent me Cigars from her trip to Honduras! MWAHAHAHAHA!

Its good to be loved. Oh yes... it is. I've not yet sample them... though I suppose its not much of an ATF without doing so. Hrm... This is just unorganized as hell ain't it? Its almost like I'm posting drunk with no planning what-so-ever.

Nah.... that couldn't be. Perhaps an update later?

Oh... and firearms... Yes... Kristy The Skank... I'm buzzed... and there are enough firearms around to stock a small museum. You and Lynard Skynard can both kiss my ass.

I hope your friday is going half as well as mine... and I hope your company is half as entertaining. If so... you'll be having a fine time indeed!

Drink up... Light up... load up.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Must You Go Out of Your Way...

to perpetuate the stereotype???

Now.. I realize that readers of this blog are blessedly ignorant of rap slang. In this case, "krunk" which is referencing "crunk", is a word popularized in rap... most noteably the rappers associated with southeastern US. The word refers to the state of being high on Chronic (Marijuana) and drunk... simultaneously.

Did anyone stop to think that maybe glorifying drugs and drunkenness with a product (basketball) marketed to young blacks in a predominantly black city was a freakin' dumb idea?

I'm sorry... you can call me a racist if ya want... but I don't know how I can be expected to take any black leader seriously that isn't screaming at the top of his lungs at how stupid and destructive this is.

You already have a stereotype of basketball players being drug using thugs... and you go and choose a name like Krunk for a team based in Atlanta???

Good.... Good thinkin'.
Question of the Day...

Why do Christians eat pork?

Answer of the day???

Matthew 15:16-20

"Are you still so dull?" Jesus asked them. "Don't you see that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and then out of the body? But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart,and these make a man 'unclean.' For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony,slander. These are what make a man 'unclean'; but eating with unwashed hands does not make him 'unclean.' "

Sometimes its nice to know that I am in fact being Christ-like when I begin my rebuttals by wondering allowed if my opponent is an idiot.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Bad Joke Wednesday!

bah! Enough with the religious discussion! On with the bloody jokes mate!

- Why did the picture go to jail?
Because he was framed.

- What did the teddy-bear say when he was offered lunch?
No thanks. I'm stuffed.

- What did the Alien say to the Gardener?
Take me to your Weeder.

- Have you heard the rumor about butter?
Nah... I better not tell ya.... it might spread.

- Why was the math book sad?
It had to many problems.

And per tradition... one Shaggy dog...

A man who lived in a block of apartments thought it was raining and put his head out the window to check. As he did so a glass eye fell into his hand.

He looked up to see where it came from in time to see a young woman looking down.
"Is this yours?" he asked.

She said, "Yes, could you bring it up?" and the man agreed.

On arrival she was profuse in her thanks and offered the man a drink. As she was very attractive he agreed. Shortly afterwards she said, "I'm about to have dinner. There's plenty; would you like to join me?"

He readily accepted her offer and both enjoyed a lovely meal. As the evening was drawing to a close the lady said, "I've had a marvelous evening. Would you like to stay the night?"

The man hesitated then said, "Do you act like this with every man you meet?"

"No," she replied, "only those who catch my eye."

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Weeds Among the Wheat

Matt 13:34

He set another parable before them, saying, "The Kingdom of Heaven is like a man who sowed good seed in his field, but while people slept, his enemy came and sowed darnel also among the wheat, and went away. But when the blade sprang up and brought forth fruit, then the darnel appeared also. The servants of the householder came and said to him, ‘Sir, didn’t you sow good seed in your field? Where did this darnel come from?’

He said to them, ‘An enemy has done this.’

The servants asked him, ‘Do you want us to go and gather them up?’

But he said, ‘No, lest perhaps while you gather up the darnel, you root up the wheat with them. Let both grow together until the harvest, and in the harvest time I will tell the reapers,
'First, gather up the darnel, and bind them in bundles to burn them;
but gather the wheat into my barn.‘"

When you read the last post of the wayward Episciple Ministeress... Was your first thought, "Throw the bum out"? Likely you weren't just thinking of stripping her of her position of leadership... but also of removing her from the Church completely... as Vox Day has called for.

Put the weed eater down son. Heed the words of your Lord.

The lesson to be learned is not that there are bad people in the Church. The point isn't even that there are bad people leading the Church. No... its a little deeper than that.

When was it that the Enemy came and planted these bad seeds?

My good friends... the point is... The Episcable Church has been asleep. We are not called to weed the field. But we can certainly wake them up!
The Epitome of Stupidity

This made me laugh:

"Shortly after noon on Fridays, the Rev. Ann Holmes Redding ties on a black headscarf, preparing to pray with her Muslim group on First Hill. On Sunday mornings, Redding puts on the white collar of an Episcopal priest.

She does both, she says, because she's Christian and Muslim"

So... let me see if I understand Mrs Ann correctly (No way am I calling this moron reverand) she believes that Jesus is the Christ. That He is the Son of God. That He is both Divine and Human.. and that He was Crusified, died, and was Resurrected. She believes that He is, as He said, "The Way, The Truth, and the Life." She believes that His death attoned for all sin. She loves the New Testament and spreads the Good News.

She also believes that Jesus was not divine. That He was just a prophet. She believes that He was not Crusified... nor was He resurected. She believes that the teaching of His divine nature are heresy and blasphamy and could be punishable by death. She believes that even if Christ had been crusified, which He wasn't, it still wouldn't attone for anyone else's sin. She rejects the New Testament as heresy and believes those who spread the Good News are Corrupters of the World and should be put to death.

This is the idiot path of Post Modernism.. where rationality and reason are set aside in the interest of feeling. It should be plainly obvious why women are more vulnerable to this nonsense than men.

In my time in the Methodist Church I've been exposed to one female minister that was exceptionally good. The others... have all sucked. Largely for the same reasons... Their sermons always devolve into self-appreciation... bragging.. and meaningless largely unrelated tear-jerker stories.


Monday, June 18, 2007

Math is Hard! (The Myth of the Pay Gap)

Yeah yeah yeah... I know... girls do the same jobs as boys... and girls make 80% of what boys make.

I know... because I have this nifty report here from the AAUW. That's the American Association of University Women.

Now the truth is... I don't have any idea what universities these american women work at... but one can easily deduce that they didn't pay much attention in statistics class... or economics... or any math at all apparently.

This report first boldly states that women who work in the same field do so for 80% of the male pay. Of course... the fun is how they got there. For example... if you look through the report you'll find that they didn't bother to control for things like... hours worked. That's either because they were intimidated by the long division... or... they knew that women worked less... and accounting for that might be counter productive to their objective... which is to piss off women. In their defense on page 39 of the report... which no one read... they admit that if you do account for hours worked the gap is only 5%. I dunno.. maybe one of the cuckholds from the Math department decided to help out.

The most egregious error though is even more comical... In order to simplify the study... because again... math is hard... they lumped thousands of professions into 11 major classifications... and simply ignored the fact that certain fields are dominated by one sex or the other. So... in the medical field for example.. they lump doctors (which are overwhelmingly male) and nurses (which are overwhelmingly female) all in one big pot and stirred it up.

Guess what they found?

Doctors (males) make more than Nurses (females).

But this isn't because of education or skill... no no... not supply and demand... nope! Its Sexism!!!

And yet... even with all their shenanigans... all they can come up with is a measley 5% difference. The truth is... given the screw ups these hags have made... there is likely considerable evidence that women actually make a great deal more than men.

Sunday, June 17, 2007

The Rebirth of Bad Joke Wednesday

For the better part of two years... every Wednesday here was BJW. I'd post several really terrible jokes and others would chime in with theirs... generally a good time was had by all. Its absence is frequently lamented... and I still get emails asking me to start it back up.

The fact is... guys... its hard to find 5 or 6 new really horrible jokes every week! So.... rather than repeating the jokes... I just killed off BJW.

Well...I've had a change of heart. I spent Fathers Day the way everyone should... I grilled some meat... and my family sat around the lunch table. I broke out an old book and started telling bad jokes... knock knock jokes... everything I could find or think of. We were all laughin' our butts off... granted DrWho and I were laughin' more at the kids and each other than the jokes... but hey.... that's the point right? Anyway... BJW will return this week... and consider it a lesson learned. I'll not stray again.

for now..

Knock Knock...

Who's there?


Ya Who?

I didn't know you were a cowboy!!!

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Happy Father's Day

So... according to my wife... its not so much Father's Day that we celebrate... but Father's Day weekend. This explains how I ended up getting the most awesomest gift ever last night.

No.... not that... Geez.... Buncha pervs...

No no... Last night I got...



Wind direction and speed...humidity indoor and out... weather forcasting... record keeping... and even a rain gauge!!

I confess... I'm a weather geek. I am continually furious about the fact that says its 90 degrees and I know for a fact its 98 at my house. See... I don't care what its doing at the airport... I care about what its doing here... where I live. Dammit.

I can't believe she found one as nice as she did... this is far better than the one I was lusting after.

Ha... it may be Father's Day... but its also a fine excuse to gloat about a fine woman.

Friday, June 15, 2007


Holy crap am I tired.

We just got back from our canoe trip... 7 miles down the Harpeth River. Its just a meandering little class 1. Any true rafter would've been bored to tears. Then again... I was dealing with a 4 year old a 2 year old and a Pregasaurus!

The whole trip took us about 3 hours... if you are looking for a way to spend the day... I highly recommend it. The water is down right now... but there is plenty to splash and swim in if ya want. The Harpeth struck us as extremely clean... fish everywhere. We saw big buffalo fish... and massive Gar... the boys dug that. Some city folk that we passed said they saw couple eagles... but if that's true it would only be explainable by an escape from the Nashville Zoo... at least that's my bet. Of course to city folk anything bigger than a pigeon is an eagle... so it goes.

Anyway... it was like 30 bucks... the boys are worn out... and everyone had a great time. Sure as hell beats a trip to the movies. We used Foggy Bottom Rentals... and recommend them.

Take some extra trash bags and pick up along the bank as ya go. Few things muck up a good trip down a river like big pile of Bud cans on the bank.
And yes... I know the pictures suck... but hey... you don't take the good camera canoing now do ya?

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Vice Cabinet Roll Call

Ok boys... let's hear about your vice cabinets! Surely we all know by now what a vice cabinet is... So... if ya have one... or are plannin' one... speak up!

As for mine...
Obviously I'm a little proud.
Now remember... function over form... and your vices may vary from mine... which may dictate a completely different design. After all... what about us is more individual than our vice?

Monday, June 11, 2007

The Top Shelf

Lets lighten things up a bit...

How about I give a run down of the current state of the Top Shelf of my Vice Cabinet? As you can see... there is a serious bias toward bourbon. In fact.. I relegate everything but the best Jack D to another section of the cabinet... over there with the peach schnaps and vodka... you know... the girls drinks.
We've got.. Makers... Silver Eagle... Blantons... Woodfords.. Bookers... Russle's Reserve... Bulleit... and if you look close back in the back... there is a damned ol' bottle of Captain Morgan to remind me to take it easy. I've even got an emergency bottle of knob creek up front... That will be going to the hospital with me when DrWho decides to pop.
Rest assured.. this is the natural state of my Vice Cabinet. No condencing has taken place... though I confess the silver eagle was just added today.
I hope yours stacks up well. If not... get busy!

Trolling Tactics

I'll grant Jeff this... his methods were original. Let me break down the game plan:

1) Ask a basic question is very basic terms, while making an obviously incorrect statement.

2) Your target will then presume you ignorant... and will give you an answer in extremely simplified terms... he may even admit that it is simplied in his answer.

3) Attack your target for over simplifying then declare yourself the victor.

That's cute. Really. At least its a novel approach. It almost made want to not ban him. Almost.

Anway... take pride Jeff... you're only the third person since 2004 to actually get banned. Elite company buddy.

Saturday, June 09, 2007

Parenting 2007

My friends... its a new day. The all-seeing, all-knowing parent has arrived.

Imagine mom... you're downstairs grabbing some laundry while your boys are playin' in their room. On a whim... you pull up your pocket pc... and check up them via the camera in their room. They run off down the hall... and you follow them with the remote tilt and swivel... or just switch to the camera in the next room.

Later on you hear crying... ya know there was trouble but ya don't know what happened.

No problem. Back on your laptop you login to a remote server that has recorded the action after a preset motion detector turned on the camera and started the recording.

You don't have to ask who hit whom. You know. You saw it.

On the road... you want to check on the new baby sitter? No problem. You can check the cameras, and control them... from your cell phone.

Door sensors trigger lights to come on... or send text messages to your phone... the kids got home safe.

Sounds like Bill Gates' house doesn't?

Nah... its no where near that expensive.

It appears that getting away with stuff just got a little bit harder.

Check up on it folks. Wireless video baby monitors are just the tip of the iceberg.

Friday, June 08, 2007


Its been a helluva week y'all... so I'm gonna keep this short and sweet...

A: Rolling Rock (Piss on you beer snobs)

T: None... will remedy that tomarrow though.

F: Oddly enough, I pulled a Bill and carried a .357 snubby all day. I'm starting to wonder about myself... if that's not a sign of gettin' old I don't know what is.

How about you? Havin' any fun tonight? Who with? How much?

In a massively hugely super-ultra-amazing discovery... scientists have invented a way to trasmit electricity wirelessly!!!

This of course would be way more super-ultra-amazing if Tesla hadn't done it 100 years ago.

We look at our fancy toys and do-dads and commit the same error over and over... each generation thinks its the smartest to ever live... and all that came before were varying degrees of neandrathals.

I'm going to break this to you gently...

Humans are no smarter today than they were 1000 years ago.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Have You Ever Noticed...

that whenever some politcal science geek starts talking about the electibility of candidate X... they always discuss physical appearence? Height... Hair... it all gets sliced and diced. Looks matter when it comes to big time elections...


Why then are Hillary's looks out-of-bounds?

Tell me ladies... do you want equality or not? Seems to me you only want the benefits of equality... you want nothing to do with the costs.

So how do you like that kids? And you thought I was just calling her fat for cheap laughs. Never assume I'm not making a point... unless its Friday.

Wednesday, June 06, 2007


Seriously. Look at the ass on this broad! She's like a ketchup bottle!
The the thing that scares me... is how many women with fat asses will vote for Hillary... just because she has a big fat ass too... I mean after all... if she has a fat ass.... and she can be president... then maybe their big fat ass is ok to!!!
Shoot Me Now

Its 92 degrees... 90% humidity... all sun... no shade... and I'm currently pulling 2-inch conduit over 4 wires... 2 1-aughts... a 2 gauge and a 4 gauge...

This wouldn't be so bad... 'cept I'm pulling 200 feet.

Lots of copper... a long long way.

Mercy... I beg... Mercy.


I pulled 105 feet today, and buried the conduit. No puller. I jerked it through on muscle and pure damned meanness. I don't know if the yellow 77 helped or hurt. I have 75 feet to pull tomarrow... after I drill through the brick in the foundation. I had just smashed through the block under the house when my drill when tits up.

I figured that was God telling me something.... and I hung it up for the day.

I'll beat some more ass tomarrow though.

Sunday, June 03, 2007

On The Death of a Really Loud Liberal...

Steve Gilliard died to young to realize how completely wrong he was. The statements he made.. almost as brash as my own... we're completely ignorant. The man knew less about history and economics than the average Elementary Ed major... which is to say he couldn't even gauge his own ignorance.

Perhaps his most infamous statement conserned his own confusion about the Myth of Seperation of Church and State. He once wrote:

"The Founding Fathers, as flawed as they were, slaveowners and pornographers, smugglers and terrorists, understood one thing, a man's path to God needed no help from the state. Is the religion of these conservatives so fragile that they need the state to prop it up, to tell us how to pray and think? Is that what they stand for? Is that their America?"

The poor guy never understood that "Seperation of Church and State" appears no where in the Constitution. He had no idea that Jefferson coined the phrase in the pulpit of a church... assuring them... not that religion wouldn't influence government... but the exact opposite. He was promising them that the force of government would never be used to interfere with their church.

No doubt liberals that read this will take this as a low blow... classless... and cruel.

The fact is its none of those.

I don't pretend to be sentimental for those I never knew. All I knew of Gilliam was his writing... and I remain unimpressed. Death doesn't bestow moral authority. Its a problem we have as humans... as soon as someone dies we fall all over ourselves to bestow sainthood on them. This is how we ended up worshipping the Tyrant Lincoln.

No doubt in the weeks to come the liberals will quote their sainted martyr... and shout names at anyone who points out that death doesn't make one correct.

The views Gilliard espoused were discusting and ignorant. The way his life ended doesn't improve them.

Friday, June 01, 2007


Ok.. so I'm the last person on the planet who should be criticizing a spelling mistake... but ummmm.... then again.... I'm not running for president am I? I'm not addressing the major players of the tech industry am I? Maybe its just me... but seems to me one of these tech fellows could've pointed out that spell checkers were invented 25 years ago.
Yeah.. I'd say there's a staffer looking for a job about now... probably 3 or 4...