Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Day 4: On the Greens with DrWho

Lets start with some general observations:

1) Vail is huge. Have I said that already? Over 5000 skiable acres on 2 mountains. The longest run... Riva.. is a black that is over 9 miles long.

2) Yankees. Pure Bred True Blue Yankees. Everywhere. Everyone is from New York City... or they're from Jersey and they "work in the city".

3) Rich yankees are dicks. I have seen at least 3 huge blowups over entirely trivial matters. This morning I was getting the boys ski boots from the storage girls... now there are two chicks at the window... you bring them your shoes and your id card... they go get your ski boots and store your shoes for the day. Simple right? So it just so happened that two guys walk up to the window at the same time... both with multiple pairs of shoes to swap for boots. So both girls were occupied.. they were doing their job.

This fat yankee with a revolting new york accent walked up to the window and immediately starts bitch, "Where ah the fucking girls? There's supposed to be two girls here. HELLO?? HELLO?? "

I'm watching this... and couldn't help myself...

"Dude. are you on vacation?"

The yankee looks at me... and says, "Who are you? I'm here to ski."

"Yeah so its a ski vacation then? So you're here to have a good time. So maybe you settle down."

The idiot yankee wasn't impressed, "I'll settle down when I get some service in here. These lazy fucks never do their jobs."

"Dude. There are kids all around you. Settle down. There are two chicks back there working their butts off. they'll be up here as soon as they get the 8 pair of boots these two guys over here sent them to get."

about that time a chick lugged four pair of ski boots up to the window and asked if she could help the idiot yankee.. who could only say, "its about time. get me my boots."

Now let me just point out... in a civilized society it would be perfectly legal and appropriate to beat the hell out of that fat bastard. Sadly... we don't live in a civilized society. and again... this is one example. I've seen it over and over again. The staff here has the costumer service edition of battered wife syndrome.

4)My wife is a badass. She had a tweeked knee from a fall yesterday... so she was hurtin' pretty bad when she put a lot of weight on it... you know... like you do when you turn? Well today she found herself at the top of a long... long... slope. Its vail green... but east coast blue... and you don't over shoot it.. because over that ledge at the bottom is a double black. or as I prefer to call it... certain death. Anyway... her leg really took her confidence and she kept looking down that looong run... a run more difficult than anything she'd done yesterday. I was watching from the bottom... but sure enough she came right on down. Smooth and in control... but slightly pissed off. From there it was catwalks trying to make our way to lions head until we hit the last section down... which is blue. Julie took it like a champ this time... great control... great technique... poll turns and everything. When I saw her at the bottom I thought she was gonna explode. She was so fired up that she'd been able to do it... worth the trip. Many adults never get that feeling... some of us need it so badly we dream up crazy schemes to experience it... regardless... when you get it... cherish it.

5) Jeb is better than he's getting credit for at ski school... because he refuses to play their reindeer games. He stops and turns very well... but they expect him to spend the day poking along... and he wants to go. I mean.... GO. so the instructor today told me as long as he was right with Jeb... he did the little slalom thing perfect... but if he wasnt... Jeb would take off flying down the mountain. He doesn't want to promote Jeb to the next level... even though he admits all the skills are there. This is mildly frustrating to me. The showing off indicates to me that he's bored and needs moved up. On the other hand... these are probably some of the best instructors in the world.

6) Eli is dealing with altitude sickness. But he's a trooper. He's having a blast at Ski School and doing very very well. He's stopping and turning.. and would be up on the mountain every day if he weren't sick. He was so tired he literally slept the whole afternoon session away... taking the world's most expensive nap. still I cannot fault the school. They handled it exactly the way I would have wanted them to.

7) I have a ton of pictures... but again... this stupid wireless network's upload speeds are so lame it times out before even one picture makes it to the blog. This is infuriating.

8) On the family friendliness scale... this place is a solid 10. The only complaint is the yankees... and you can take steps to insulate your exposure to them. You'd be amazed how fast they stop their idiotic nattering when you start talking about guns.

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