Thursday, May 20, 2010

Then He Returned!!!!

Ok not really. I'm still on the road... in some little town in north Georgia. I wanted to post some pics though of my latest solo ride. JAC apparently sprained a felopian tube and couldn't come with me... so its just me. No worries.

This old covered bridge was apparently featured in a movie in 1951. I do believe all of them have been.

Not far passed the covered bridge I found the first winery. I may have had a sample... or two. And... I learned a great deal here. Aparently... wineries are where you go to pick up chicks. Who knew? Now understand... I will not divuldge which winery this episode took place at.
So I walk in... and of course... there are two cute chicks behind the wine bar looking to hand out free wine. At the bar are two attractive women in the low to mid thirties... who have... had a few samples. Perhaps... quite a few.
I successfully avoided the wiles of those particular harpies... but the wenches behind the counter proved to be far more challenging. The brunette serving samples was shameless in her flirting. Which of course was horribly offensive to one as noble and upright as I... but as forward as she was... the blonde cashier was her better.
So I picked out the perfect bottle for my beautiful wife... and attempted to pay for it... things went downhill from there.
Cashier Harpy: So... You ride a BMW.
Ooo... its red. That's a really pretty bike. Ya know my favorite professor in college rode a BMW.
Brunett Harpy suddenly appears and says, "You mean the one you were screwing?"
"She has a thing for motorcycles... especially red motorcycles. So watcha up to today?"
I would like to point out that at this point I haven't spoken a word. These women are good.
"Out riding around the mountains girls... decided to stop in and pick up a bottle for my wife."
Now... that was a dumb thing to say. Oh sure.. some of you are thinking that should've warned them off. Of course... the married men amongst us know better.
Now it was the blonde's turn... "aww... that's sweet... so you're off on your own today then?" Brunette... on demand... blushes and laughs and acts shocked that she'd be so forward.
Time to go. Palms are getting sweaty. Not good. These she-devils probly have bodies stacked up in a freezer in the back somewhere. Still.. a man has to leave an impression...
"There was a time girls."
Then I reached out and mussed their hair... and said, "But I just ain't as good as I was back then..."
Everyone had a good laugh and the blonde gave me a hug.... afterwich I was allowed to pay for my wine and escape with my soul safely intact.

This sight was only partly as terrifying as the girls in the winery.

I stumbled across this while I was out riding around. Apparently these falls were discovered by a Confederate Captain while he was out on a ride to. He named them after his only child... Anna Ruby.
The roads have been fabulous. Sorry I don't have more time to write. Smokes are calling my name.
Y'all be safe. I'll check in tomarrow.

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