Miss Me?

Damn Y'all its good to be back. I'm still unpacking and likely will be for a few days. Rest assured though, I shall resume my standard blogging habits now that I've returned. For now... let me tide you over with this...

Are you familiar with tubing? Its a sport involving a rope, a ski boat, an innertube, and a dumbass willing to be abused. Turns our for several minutes... that dumbass was me!

Now first lets talk protocol. I know you may have seen some people sitting on tubes, happily bouncing along behind the boat. That's not tubing. That is however, an excellent way to get a forced water enema.

Ahhh well.. to make a long story short... I was bamboozeled. Before I mounted the accursed tube I was advized to attempt to steer it by leaning one way or the other. I, an idiot, beleived this and, being arrogant, attempted it. The result was predictable. I was on the tube about 25 seconds before splashing rather terribly.

Next try... I learned my lesson... OK... back on the tube... boat takes off. One of the interesting things about tubing si the relative speed. You really don't know how fast you're going. I remember the boat start doing S turns. This throws you all over the place. You end up jumping your own wake. Not good! On this second run I was holding my own though. I even managed to give the "speed up" sign. FOOL!

I could tell we were going faster now... but not how much... the only way I knew was... sometimes the tops of my feet would skip across the surface of the water... and it felt... really really hot... lots of friction... or maybe... I was loosing a layer of skin... Anyway the ride seemed to go on forever... the I saw the boat make a hard right turn, and the rope went slack... then the boat made an immediate hard left.

Now I ain't got no physics degree... but I was shakin' my head just the same... cause I knew damned well what was fixin' to happen to me.

Well the next ten seconds were a blur. think of it like the roller coaster from Hell, sept you really can die. In fact... at some point, you may wish for that very thing. I made it a lot longer than anyone expected though.. and in the end, I got to go skipping 35 feet across the water! now if you can slide 35 feet on top of water at 30 miles an hour... how far do you skid on concrete at 130???

Despite the tone of my lament, I can assure you that DrWho and I had a blast with the Lengendary Shane Smith and his people. Good on ya Boys!