Friday, April 29, 2005

ATF

Well... I find myself at our secret lair in Murfreesboro. Headquarters for, and starting point of most of the trouble/adventures that my brothers and I get into.

That my friends is always a good thing.

Now lets start with the smokes... which I'm sad to say I have none of right now. Why you ask? Well... for one... My Worthless Brother (MWB) A.K.A. "Welldigger" has no humidor. By "no humidor" I don't mean he has a small humidor... or a travel humidor... or a humidor that barely functions... I mean none. Ziltch. Nada.

I have a humidor... JAC has a humidor... Digger however... the one who really needs the humidor... is without.

This puts us in quite a spot. See... When we come to the Murfreesboro HQ we tend to stay a while... so in the area of smokes... we either have to come empty handed... or have some means of storing a proper stash after the trip.

Digger don't have a humidor though... so we have no where to store anything. We're screwed. Continually we find ourselves thinking... "Man.. I'd like a good smoke."

Then we look at our watches and realize that the only Tobaccoist within a half-hour closed an hour ago. Then it's off to walgreens to buy some cheap crap to feed the fix until the next day.

See why Digger needs a humidor? We could just walk inside... open it up... make our choice... and enjoy our smoke.

If it sounds like I'm throwin' Digger under the bus here... It's because I am.

Every decent man should own a humidor, and ladies... You should know that if your husband doesn't smoke, and doesn't have a humidor, it's not necessarily a poor reflexion on you... but I will point out that it usually is.

More often than not, when a man doesn't smoke its either because of inferior genes, or because some woman somewhere told him he shouldn't. This is sorta like the way that a man in unkept, dirty, or ragged clothes is more a reflexion on his wife, than himself.

hehehe... boy that's gonna piss off some girls.

Anyway... I've harassed Digger, who by the way does not have a humidor, and now I've needled the ladies too... I better quit while I'm ahead.

I do believe this evenin' I'm gonna slip off to the cigar bar for a smoke and a sip o' Makers. How 'bout you?

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