Thursday, February 05, 2015

Calling Out Texas

Hey!    Texas!   Swagger on over here little sister its time for a come to Jesus meetin'.

Ya know your "Don't Mess with Texas" crap?  I'm sick of it.  You're all hat and no cattle.  How can I say that?  I'm glad you asked.

You have some of the worst gun laws of any red state.  In fact... your gun laws are so bad... they aren't even as good as freaking Ohio.  Open carry is legal in Ohio... and your state is so facist on Conceal Carry...  its not even as good as freaking Minnesota!

MINNESOTA!!!!   You know?  Those morons that elected freakin' Al Franken and sent him to the Senate?   They have better carry laws than you do.

Freedom?  Rugged independence?

Shut the hell up.

You're like the Illinois of the Southwest.  You're like freakin' New York.  You have carry laws but they suck so bad they may as well not exist.

So screw you Texas.

I don't want to hear shit from you until you get your crap together.

Call me when you grow a pair of balls.

Oh... one more thing...  You suck at college football too.


Stg58 / Animal Mother said...

this post is gay.

Stilicho said...

Mary, Mary, ever cherry,
How does your hymen grow?

Oh, wait... wrong blog?

Stilicho said...

Ohio shortened ccw training to 8 hrs, carrying in a bar is legal, vehicle carry is legal, multiple carry is legal, open carry, etc. It still lacks a stand your ground law but that's coming.

Raggededge said...

Florida is not an open carry state, even if you have a carry permit.

jaericho said...

Come on! Give us Minnesotans credit for something. We elected Al Franken twice....wait, scratch that, nevermind.

Susan said...

I have been wondering for a while now what in the Wide World of Sports is the matter with Texas. I mean seriously, to be followers instead of leaders in the most basic of rights?

I suspect that whatever is infecting Austin also is infecting even the most conservative minded Texan, because this is just not right.

Minnesota also elected a freak named Jessica Ventura as governor at one time too.

Athor Pel said...

I've only lived here about 4 years so I have no idea how these laws came about.

But on a gut level my first instinct is to blame Austin.

And Dallas/Ft Worth.

And Houston.

But mostly Austin.

Nate said...

I think its mostly the Law and Order response to the Wild West of 120 years ago that really did it.

Ben said...

Hey. As far as elected officials go, Ventura wasn't that bad.

But yeah, Minnesota is retarded. Love the land, hate the inhabitants.

Russ said...

Texas is the Harley Davidson of states.

Ben said...

Here's what they are doing in frickin texas instead of fixing their poser laws.

Giraffe said...

My dad said that when he was in the army the guys from Texas would brag about it being the biggest state. It would really piss them off when it was pointed out that you could cut Alaska in two and make them third.

Perhaps it is just proximity, but as bad as Texas is, it isn't as bad as Minnesota.

Res Ipsa said...

Two words:

Constitutional Carry

If ya ain't got it you suck.

jmyron said...

Also, if you guys could do something about the Slingshot situation, it would help me out a lot.

Guitar Man said...

And VT and NH are probably some of the best states for gun rights (though the Massholes are doing their best to change that). Texas is a big state with a big government. They vote republican because they enjoy bombing the Middle East.

Stg58 / Animal Mother said...

The ban on open carry happened because the Yankee carpet bagger government didn't want freed slaves carrying guns in public so they banned it.

patrick kelly said...


cheddarman said...

Nate, I am glad you finally managed to say something good about Ohio.

Now, how about that picture of you with the OSU hat on your dome?

Marissa said...

We have open carry in Texas, but it's only restricted to barrels of a certain length. So we can't open carry handguns, which I agree, is silly. We just recently got vehicular carry -- how sad is that? Only a few years ago it was illegal.

Noah B. said...

"That's a Texas brand of stupid. I don't have to worry about someone seeing my gun anywhere but Texas."

This is wrong. The key word in the law is "intentionally." In other words, you are only criminally liable if you intentionally expose your concealed handgun.

Based on the theory that exposing a gun to open view would represent some kind of threat. Epic stupid, like politicians tend to do.

I love Alabama. I love the land, the people, the culture, and I'm quite jealous of the rain. The humidity, not so much. But when it comes to views, Texas has got Alabama beat hands down. (And Utah is even better if you haven't been there yet.) If y'all are ever out here please be sure and let me know, and maybe I can show you some things that will change your mind.

Till then, God bless you and yours.