Tuesday, January 31, 2006

State of the Union

You have got to be kidding me. So its not the War on Terrorism any more... now its the War on Tyranny.

Gotcha. So if there is tyranny anywhere in the world... it is our job to go stop it. Don't think so? When the president spoke to the people of Iran tonight... he had one simple message; we're coming.

He may as well have declared war.

One thing Dubya has over Clinton when it comes to SotU addresses... he doesn't just outright lie. Clinton sited more bs statistics than high school coach selling his senior QB to Big State U.

I watched it from begining to end... mostly laughing at the pure obsurdity of it... by the time it was over I was expecting Dubya to turn around and walk away... revealing the entire back of his suit to be missing.

Ethynol from grass... Hydrogen cars... clean coal... 30,000 new math and science teachers... Geese that lay Golden Eggs... winning lottery tickets for every American... and beer trees in every back yard.

All that... oh yeah... and by the way... we're taking over the world.

The man has lost his mind people.
Draw Your Own Conclusions (By DrWho)


This is probably a HIPA violation, so I will try to limit the details.

I had a patient the other night who required stat surgery (immediate). I went to take him to the OR and I was quite annoyed with him. He was a very sick man who made himself that way by his past use of IV drugs. He was dirty and malnurished with greasy hair. He was talking out of his head. Asking the same questions over and over that weren't really relevant and just generally making an ass of himself. I wasn't happy. After all, I could've been sleeping.

I took him back to surgery which was giong to be attempted with him awake (sounds bizarre, but you would be amazed at what surgeons can do with a little lidocaine a long wire and an x-ray machine). I had started to give him some medicine to sedate him, but it wasn't working. He was still annoying me! I had had about enough when he looked up at me and said, "Do y'all say a prayer or anything?"

I shot back at him, "that no, not usually." (If I may interject here... you have to understand... Your brain surgery is a very big deal to you... but to the folks in the OR... its nothing. Its changing the oil. They do it all day every day. In fact... DrWho may well have typed this post up while someone's skull was open in front of her. Or it may have been a heart... you never know. Things that you and I assume are dreadfully complicated and moderiately terrifying are almost boring to these people.)

I immediately felt ashamed. How could I deny this man a prayer? I had no idea about his religious background. This could have been his first time to ask for God's help. I also hate praying out loud; I am very self concious. I had a fleeting thought about being sued for talking about God in the OR, but I decided I had to pray for this man. I leaned down next to his ear and took his hand into mine and opened up my heart to this man and prayed for him like he was my own father.

His heart rate which had been high came down, and his blood pressure which had been dangerously low came up. In fact, it was the only time in the whole surgery that his blood pressure had a normal reading. He immediately closed his eyes and fell asleep. He finally looked at peace. He didn't say another word the rest of the procedure. I felt so proud that God had used me that way, and so ashamed that I almost missed that opportunity. I had on my anesthesia record physical proof with his vital signs of the power of prayer. It was amazing.
Problem Solving (By Dr Who)

Here is a little something for you fellow nerds/geeks out there.

One of the things we keep track of in the OR for a really sick person with a bad heart is called Cardiac Output (CO), which is essentially how well the heart pumps blood to the rest of the body. It is defined as CO=SVxHR, where SV is Stroke Volume and HR is Heart Rate. Well, you can imagine HR is easy to measure, but how the hell do you measure the amount in milliliters of blood that the heart is pumping out?

Well, you can look at it with an ECHO machine. This is where you put a probe down someone's throat and use ultrasound to look at the heart. It is not very accurate and is very subjective. So they had to come up with another way to effectively measure CO that most anesthesiologists and Intensive Care Unit nurses could use. This is what they came up with.....

So you put a specialized catheter down one of the veins in a person's neck. This catheter goes through the right side of the heart and into the Pulmonary artery (which carries all of the blood in the body to the lungs to get oxygen) until it can go no further. (It actually has a balloon on the end of it that we inflate to help it "float" through the maze of the veins, heart and arteries.) You have to be careful not to "tickle" the heart with this catheter or you could send the heart into a fatal rhythm.

Then, we inject fluid through a hole in the first chamber of the heart. The fluid is of a known rather low temperature. The tip of this specialized catheter which is in the Pulmonary Artery measures the temperature of the blood. The temperature should go down as this colder fluid makes its way through the heart. Our computer then plots out the changes in temperature on a graph and the area under the curve is calculated. This number is then used to calculate the Cardiac Output. If the heart pumps poorly, then it will take a long time for the cooler blood to reach the end of the catheter. If the heart pumps well, then the cooler fluid will reach the end of the catheter very quickly with a small volume under the curve.

Pretty cool, huh?
Equality!

I can't wait for the NARAL take on this... I mean... No doubt she was just striking out at the oppressive male regime.
Border Stupidity

Aparently there was a great protest about US border policy yesterday... which is odd... as the best I can tell there isn't a border at all between the US and... well.... anywhere.

But the mere mention of actually creating one has many people in a hussy... no doubt the ones who are mostly tightly wound are the ones with the most to lose... you know... the ones who don't want to have to climb a wall if they get deported...

but alas... see their quote in this article:

"A migrant dies on the border everyday already," said Ada Omana, a migrant activist who lives in New York City. "With this wall, we are going to see more corpses in the desert."

In response I say...

Awesome.

Please name another law that we don't enforce for fear of harming the criminal. Criminals dieing in the desert... I'm supposed to have a problem with this? A couple things here...

Did they not know there was a desert? Are we to believe that they were just strolling along and suddenly thought, "Holy chit main! Is hot! No Aqua!"

Look... if you're to weak, or to stupid to get across that desert, then we don't want you. Its like natural selection. dig? I mean dayum... I don't want to have to worry about the help droppin' dead while he's mowin' my lawn. We need to know these boys can take it. Crossin' that desert is like a job application and interview all rolled into one.

If I had my way they'd line up lawnmowers and tool belts all along that border, and anyone who arrived on the other side of the desert without one of each would be sent back.

Thats not really plausible though... so I'll stick with the wall for now. Hey... the tougher it is to get here... the better the help will be when they finally make it. If he can scale a 20 foot wall, and then run through a desert... just think how fast he can tote a wheelbarrow full of mulch!

Monday, January 30, 2006

Repost: The One Party System (because I felt like it)

I cannot for the life of me understand how one can continue to support the Invertibrate Elephant, any more I can see how one could support the Jackass Socialist Workers Party. How hard is it to see, that regardless of which holds power... Government continues along the same path? If anything, greater freedoms are lost under the guidance of the Invertibrate Elephants than under the Jackasses.

Hrm... Who started the EPA again? The Patriot Act? Yes yes... I know all you Republicans would've been thrilled to support the P.A. if it had been a Jackass wielding its new powers. The fact is... this country is not run by elected officials. It's run by the mindless army of bureacrats that standardize those officials... educate them... and make sure they go about their business without stirring up to much of a fuss.

One of the built in issues with exchanging the leadership of a representative republic, is the inherent possibilty of rampant instability. One group in power creating... then another coming behind them, and changing direction completely... only to have a third come along and tear it all down to start over. Ask yourself... Why doesn't this happen?

Simply... it's because the beureucrats remain. They take great care to insure continuity. Abandon all hope of radical change. The system is designed to supress it. The income tax is here to stay. As is the EPA... The Energy Department... The Department of Education... and all other blasphemous evils.

So long as the system remains... there shall be beureacrats with a vested interest in perpetuating it. They shall forever strive to protect their racket... as it's that racket that provides them FatCat status. They cannot allow a program to be cut... because that would eliminate some section of their own... and if one department goes... who's to say that their own department may not be next?

I no longer fret over who is elected and who is not. My dismay is caused not by the choice... but by the fact that once again, the People were duped into the false choice of the Whatsit.

The stone will roll downhill so long as the stone is round. Voting on the color of the stone will never stop it.
Ugly Chick Dies of Cancer

We're all supposed to wet ourselves because an ugly chick who used feminism as an excuse to write plays about incest died today.

If this doesn't brighten your day... I can't imagine what would.

Wait... Was this crass?
Harem Update

Darlin' Joy has submitted a more up-to-date picture... Take notice... no make up... and how about her accessorizing?

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Shoot Me Now

Washington Pennsylvania... which is about 30 minutes north of me, and about 40 minutes south of Pittsburgh... has officially changed its name to Steeler, PA.

The name will revert back to Washington, PA on February 5th.

classy.
All-time Favorites

I'm not asking what's the greatest movie ever... what you think is the best...

I just wanna know your favorite. And just because I know narrowing it down to one is practicly impossible I'm gonna cut you some slack. Name two.

I'll start:

1. Its a Wonderful Life

1A. Forrest Gump

I know I know... You expected The Usual Suspects... or Star Wars or LOTR... Hope you're not to disappointed.
With Apologies to Bill

Any of you who've ever had that pleasure of living or working near a large military base... you've heard these stories before... at least you have... if you know the right bars, and keep your ears open...

Seems several years ago one of our Titan II launch facilities had a serious Code Brown.

An unidentified object was coming at them. No friend or foe alert... no radio contact. At these facilities, until proven otherwise the assumption is that an unidentified object, is an fact a missile coming to destroy the launch capabilities of the base. These matters are not handled lightly at all.

Calls made.. orders recieved... Launch sequence begun.

The orders were clear. You have been authorized to launch.. but you must visually ID the object first. Now think about that. We told these boys to launch. It was up to them to make the call. If the boys responsible for that ID get it wrong... they just started WWIII.

No pressure.

So here they are.. scanning the sky... hopin' like hell they aren't gonna see a missile dropping out of the sky...

When they see a beat up US jet... limping down for a controlled crash... I mean landing.

***Whew***

Disaster averted...

The Reverse Sequence is begun to disarm the missile and return in to normal settings... Now one thing about this sequence. The last step is a big magnetic knob with three positions. To one side is the launch sequence... straight up is standby... and the other side is "Fire".

Well... as that ol' boy turned that knob to the straight position... well... catastrophic failure. The switch arced. The missile launched.

Somebody get the President a phone and a change of underwear. Apparently we just blew up the world.

Well... except the first step to disarming the missile actually wipes the flight path clean. So the big Titan II shot skyward until it realized it didn't know where it was going.... so it did what it was programmed to do... it fell.

At somepoint... while watching that nuke fall towards them... I just know somebody at that base said,"Its ok... they are programmed not to go off when they hit like this."

And I reckon someone else probably pointed out that those magnetic switches are made not to arc too.

But she hit the ground... and she went thump.. not boom... and we all slept right through it... and I guess until today.... you didn't realize how close the world came to ending.

Just so ya know... this isn't the only story I've ever heard like this... In fact.. given the number of missiles around the world... and the standards of soviet engineering and work ethic... I'd say its a damned miracle we're alive at all.

Friday, January 27, 2006

ATF!

This is bound to be a downer after the return of the Harem... but tradition demands it. I sincerely hope y'all are all sippin' something ya love... except Jamie of course... who I hope is pounding tinnies.

Guiness Space Bunny? or is it wine tonight? Vox got is pinky out sippin' on something with an umberella in it?

JAC... that's some Russell's Reserve in your hand right?

Don't lie to me boys... after lookin' through the harem pics I know you're all thinkin' of a nice drink. Hell.. PORCUS bit the Bulliet about noon! Might have had it for breakfast! Poor ol' boy must've known it was gonna be a rough day.

Hrm...

Ya know I've been thinking about this request for stats... Maybe I should be including favorite drinks and choice of firearm with the ladies pics? How 'bout it girls? What do ya drink? What do you like to shoot? How about tunes?

I'm sippin' on some Woodfords Reserve and I'll prolly even have some Blantons later on... I know I know.. but I'm in the mood.. shut up... Cross Canadian Ragweed is playin'... Charlie Robinson's gonna come on before long too... along with Cash andKristofferson... You can't be drinkin' foo foo drinks with that kinda music on... it's blasphemy.

Lets face it... a beer just won't do it when "Angel flyin' to close to the ground" is playin'.

Anyway... I've got a 7-shot .357 wheelgun... a nice smoke... honduras smoke... who knew? Good tunes... guns.. good music...

Boys are tucked in and sleepin' the peaceful sleep of children.

It's not bad... not to bad. Hope you can say the same.

Now before I go... A picture and a song...


***Chorus***
George Jones and Jesus
Are two hero's of mine
One is only human
and the other one divine

When I could not find a friend
I found out that I had two
George Jones and Jesus
Pulled me through.

When a man is on the bottom
he may not cry for help.
But he needs to know he's not alone
in hell all by himself

Those songs ol' George was singing
They somehow eased the hurt.
And Jesus did not turn me out
When a bar room wasy my church.

***Chorus***

Now the Possum ain't no savior
but he never claimed to be.
and Jesus hung out with a crowd
of troubled souls like me

Now you can't find a George Jones Classic
in a big black book of hymns
But I'm living proof that Jesus saves
in a smoky place like this.

***Chorus***
The Harem

DrWho

Darlin' Joy

Kristy

Space Bunny













Jeanne! Pumping Iron!

Blondage

Wouldn't you like to know?

Renee

Morgan of the Lake (Token Hippy! I got a Token Hippy!)


















Taylor wants to play too!

Of course there were several entries that were just unfit for publication... many of which no amount of photoshopping could dignify. That's not a complaint of course... That's just the way it is. Now.. you may recall that there were womens in the previous Harem who are not pictured... They have not been removed. Once a HaremGirl... always a HaremGirl... they most likely simply didn't send pictures along... or sent pictures to naughty to include. I suspect the Harem will grow as well now that its back up for all to see. I do hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Are You Suprised?

No doubt you've already read a dozen blogs that are huffing and puffing endlessly on the various meanings that can be extrapolated from the Hamas victory in "palestine". I'm sure you've read that its a victory for democracy... for the process. I'm sure you've read that its the end of the world. I'm sure you've read that's its the worst possible out come... and I'm sure you've read that its the most beautiful thing in the world when armed men lay down their guns and vote.

Well.. I'm not sure of any of those things. I'm actually hoping that my readers are smart enough to skip any article or blog that prints such stupidity.

Hamas' win isn't shocking.. or poignant.. or particularly revealing. If you learned something from it that I can only conclude that you have a serious dearth of historical knowledge.

This isn't new. It's is in entirely predictable.

Peoples routinely elect tyrants and dictators... even when they have a choice in the matter. The Germans for example didn't have to elect the Nazi Party. The Italians didn't have to elect the Fascist Party. Americans didn't have to elect Abraham Lincoln. On and on and on we can go back through history and find examples of evil men using the powers of Democracy to initially gain power... then of course they use the force of arms to keep it.

Hamas is in power now. Don't think for one second that they will release that power in an election.

There is a basic flaw in the modern understanding of human nature. It claims that man seeks freedom.

This is incorrect. History and obversable reality teach that the majority of people want to be dominated. They want to be ruled. Like a dog that loves its kennel... restrictions make them feel secure.

We see this all over America today.. and indeed all over the world. People seek out parking restrictions on their own streets... then they go buy permits to put on their cars so they can park on that very same street.

Why?

Because just parking on the street made them uncomfortable. They wanted a document that showed it was ok for them to do so.

They need someone to tell them its ok.

Remember... we are the minority. Those of us who want to be left alone... who rely on ourselves rather than on society... we are the freaks. Its not the otherway around.

There are always more sheep than wolves... and the sheep always look to the shepard to save them... Even while the shepard leads them off to the sheers.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Public Service Announcement

The Bloggerblaster Guide to Women's Personals Ads:

40-ish ........................ 49.
Adventurous .............. Slept with everyone.
Athletic ...................... No breasts
Average looking .......... Moooo.
Beautiful .................... Pathological liar.
Emotionally Secure ... On medication.
Feminist .................... Fat
Free spirit .................. Junkie
Friendship first .......... Former slut.
New-Age ................... Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-Fashioned ........... No BJs.
Open-minded ............. Desperate
Outgoing ................... Loud and Embarrassing.
Professional .............. Bitch
Voluptuous ................ Very Fat
Large frame ............... Hugely Fat
Wants soul mate ....... Stalker

Insert bad jokes here.
Mad Max Rules





Stormtroopers are gay.
T - 59 Days

Our house is still not on the market... and we are now practically certain that we will be buying a house without ever actually stepping foot in it.

What a bizarre life we lead.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Red Wings Suck

The Predators just beat the hated Detroit Red Wings twice in two nights.

Nashville is now in first place in the Western Conference.

I know this is in Revelation somewhere.
Internet Anonymity

Over at his place Will posts:

"Nate, on the other hand, has done a horrible job at keeping his PERSEC tight. Posting pictures of him, his family, his house, his truck, his bike, and his address back this up a little. "

I get stuff like this a lot. On one hand you have guys like Bane and Vox who freak if you go so far as to mention how many kids they may or may not have. Strange... especially considering that Vox's alter-ego has a fan club. I suppose they do this because they know there are freaks out there, and its likely they've said something to piss the freaks off.

Now seriously... those of you who read this blog... or know me through commenting elsewhere... do you really think I haven't thought about this? Ya think this is an accident?

Lets look at it. What's the worst that could happen?

ID theft? Whose ID? Mine? So what? I don't have credit cards. Fixing my credit report (which I do check by the way and so should you) would be a minor inconvenience... mostly because I don't borrow money. Just ain't worried about it.

Ahh... but what if some freak got pissed and came by the house? One can only hope. I've never gotten to shoot a real live human being with the pt-101... but I hope to one day.

Look... I post some fairly radical stuff here. I think differently than just about everyone you're gonna meet. If got stories on here that many people simply find unbelievable. And why should they be believable? Its the internet... you can make up anything you want... and post anything you want. Truth has no meaning here.

I choose to lend the blog some credibility though. I do that by providing some evidence. My family is here reading this stuff. My wife... my brothers... my in-laws. If I am just making stuff up, they will call me out on it. I don't post under some lame ass alias. I'm Nate dammit. I use my name.

So could the Bloggerblaster be full of shit? Of course. But there is less reason to doubt me than say... Bane. Not because Bane is lieing... but because there are no verifications of anything Bane says. Face it... for all you know Bane is a 15-year-old kid who read a lot of comics and military novels. I don't say this to cast aspertions. Bantrants is a great blog. I'm just using it to make a point. Bane trades personal security for a lack of credibility. I don't.

Is it stupid?

That's for you to decide. I don't care. The real threats are always physical. Its the physical I prepare for and guard against. Hyper-vigilance doesn't even begin to describe it. Come on... I nearly killed someone in a post-office for the crime of being a paleskinny male in dark clothes and creeping me out while talking to my kid.

Let me give a recent example. The other night my dad and I were talkin' in the kitchen... it was late... we are all about ready for bed... but home invasions had been in the news and were the topic of discussion. I was of course blowing it off. Dad looked at me and said, "hey... it happens everyday. It could happen to you. They could kick that front door down." Now... here I am standing around in a bitch beater and a pair of boxers.

I took two quick steps, produced a firearm from no where and aimed at the front door. This happened in around a second. This of course suprised my Dad... but I have no idea why it would. You'd think he'd know by now.

Not bad really... but probly not as good as JAC... who simply carries a side arm at all times. Cut me some slack. I was ready for bed.

Its all just risk assesment and preparation. No big deal.

Monday, January 23, 2006

You've Got to be Shitting Me

Those slant-eyed yella bastards from Toyota are going to join NASCAR???

Building the railroads is one thing... driving a carberated 900 horse power behemoth around the half-mile salad bowl we call Bristol is quite another. Ain't it bad enough that NASCAR had to teach them how to make their engines when they joined the truck series?

And what are they gonna race anyway? I mean.. I know the modern Monte Carlo on the sales floor has jack squat to do with the car they race on sunday... but at least they actually offer a v-8 in the thing. The only v-8 toyota makes goes in what they loosely define as a truck.

And seriously... I know washed-up ol' DW drives their truck... but what driver is gonna squeeze into that Prius or whatever they call it?

Dayem.. it'll probly even be a hybrid.... with airbags... prolly even be sponsored by Tampax or some shit... or GreenPeace...

Somebody shoot me.

I can see it now... Ward Burton mumbling after a 40th place finish at Daytona...

"Wayell.... yaknowman... Eye'd jus leyek 'a thaynk all 'em boys what warked on at tampax tampoons number 82 tie-ota. We give'em hayell till that engine gave out on lap 10... with ire fool milage I reckon we'd had somethin' far 'em if we'd just had a chaince."

I am depressed.
Another Boring Finance Post

I know y'all hate it when I post these stock rants... after all.... how many times do you need to hear "the sky is falling!" Yeah well... take the good with the bad... it's my blog... dammit.

So lately I've had this post floating around in my head. I've been trying to figure out a clear way to explain what's wrong with the American stock market. Well... this mornin'... I was sittin' there watchin' Sportcenter... eatin' a dognut... and I had what alcoholics call a moment of clarity.

Think of your family as a publicly traded company. Think of your financial decisions the way a CEO does. Think of your family's stock prices. In todays market... what decisions would you make to make your stock price go up? Would those decisions actually benefit your family's financial health?

The answer is of course no. Quite the opposite actually. CEO's are largely judged by stock performance, but stock performance rarely has anything to do with profit. It's about hype.

If you wanted to increase your family's stock price for example... you'd need to get folks excited. You'd go out and borrow a ton of money and of course you'd finesse the reports to make it look like income. You'd buy fancy cars and a huge house... you'd wear all kinds of jewelry. You'd strut around in fancy clothes.

Folks would see your reports... see the money going out... and they'd get excited to. You'd have some buzz. Your stock would go up. This however, is exactly the opposite of what you should be doing to secure a long term financial future for your family.

Disagree?

Look at Ford. They borrowed and stole for a decade... aquiring Volvo and Jaguar... strutting out race car replicas that look great on a stage but turn blood red on a balance sheet... And where are they now?

They're right where your family would be if you had bought that million dollar house and the Hum-vee.

Broke... in the name of Hype.
Y'all Shoulda Known

By now the sportsmedia is all in a tissy over the shocking Super Bowl matchup. After all... for a week now we'd heard that Steve Smith was an unstoppable super human force, and Shaun Alexander was only good for piling up stats on the likes of San Fransisco.

Over at SI 1 guy picked Seattle... and precisely one guy picked Pittsburgh. It wasn't the same guy either.

Hopefully you boys are all happily countin' your money this morning. After all... I told you Pitt and Seattle were gonna win. I know I know... You heard all about Carolina's defense... and all about how Steve Smith single-handedly destroyed the Greatest Defense of All Time...

Well guess what?

Sometimes... no... most of the time the media ends up reporting what it is saying as fresh news. Someone writes a piece talking about Smith being awesome... someone else reads it... likes it... and writes his own.. and it snowballs... Until by the end of the week the game is pointless because everyone knows that no one can possibly beat a team with Steve Smith on it.

When you see this happening... bet the other way. Always bet the other way. Come people... this was insane. You've got the league MVP who just racked up 1900 yards rushing and set the new league record for touch downs... being drug through the mud like an average player. More than once I heard people say, "If Shaun Alexander is so good, why hasn't he been signed?"

Looking back... can you honestly say you're suprised? I mean... back in week 10... if I tell you that Seattle is gonna pound Carolina in the playoffs... totally shut down Steve Smith, and Shaun Alexander is gonna roll for 130 and 2 tds are you gonna think twice about it? No. Back then you'd've said... "yeah.. I can see that." The media just blew the Panthers up way to much.

As for the Broncos...

Listen carefully... They have a good ground game.... but its not that good. There is a team that can run on Pitt... but it's not the Broncos. Plus... Plummer... Plummer! I hate it for that dude. I really am a fan of his. I wanted him to pull it out. But what happened? Exactly what I said would happen. He puked all over himself in the big game. All year long Denver had gotten by without leaning to much on him... but yesterday they had to, and he crumbled. Until proven wrong, always bet against Plummer in championship games.

But to much time is going to be spent slamming Plummer when the real criminal yesterday was Denver's defense. Holy cow did they suck. They made Big Ben look like Dan Marino out there. The vaunted blitz package that the idiot Boomer Isiason claimed was the thickest in the NFL was exposed for the joke it is. Of course... it's not the most complicated in the NFL. That distinction belongs to the Ravens... or perhaps the Steelers... next year the Titans will be back in that mix as well.

But enough...

Count your money. This was the easiest championship round to predict that I can remember.

Friday, January 20, 2006

Starting Friday Off Right

Crom stops by to get things going: I understand that you are an expert in whiskies and bourbons, and I need a recommendation. Woodford Reserve and Maker's Mark are what I currently have in the cabinet and I want something of comparable quality - but something that is a different experience to drink. Something unusual. I figured that since it's Friday and I am going home by way of the liquor store, you are the man to ask.

Nate... Bourbon Expert... I like the sound of that...

Now... on to the answers... and yes... I mean plural.

Makers is and of itself an out of the ordinary bourbon. It shares method with Wild Turkey alone... a preculiar quirk in their barrell choice that gives them both a sweeter taste. Woodfords approaches classic bourbon taste. Now... something different... but still very good...

Do we have a budget?

If not then let me point you over to the Bookers. 128 proof... smooth... change your attitude heat. It if were scotch it would be 150 years old and 500 bucks an ounce. It ain't cheap though... you're dropping 40 bucks here.. minimum. For similar money you can snatch up some Blantons Original Single Barrel. 93 proof. Very very good... also... very different. It tastes like... Blantons.

In the $30 range things open up a bit... You have the 3 brothers of Bookers... Knob Creek, Bakers, and Basil Haydens. All bottled by Jim Beam and named after the legendary master distillers of their day. I love Basil Haydens... its got a peppery aroma and taste that come from the larger percentage of rye in its production. Its actually got twice what most bourbons have. Knob Creek and Basil Haydens are my official recommendations in this price range.

For $20 bucks or so I'm gonna send you off to find some Wild Turkey Russel's Reserve. One of the best buys in all of bourbon. Other options include Jim Beam Black (run away) and 1792 Reserve. 1792 doesn't have the nose that Woodfords does, but it's different, and its very very good. If you try Jim Beam Black... don't blame me. I warned you. The stuff sucks.

Did I miss anything boys?

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Happy Birthday General Lee

"Private and public life are subject to the same rules. Truth and manliness are two qualities that will carry you through this world much better than policy or tact or expediency or other words that were devised to conceal a deviation from a straight line."

It's telling that today tact is seen as a beneficial attribute that all should aquire, while in the past it was quite the opposite. This is a quote that I hold dear. It contains wisdom that I desperately hope to pass on to my sons.

Anyone else have a favorite Lee story or quote?

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Raisin' Em Up Right

Ya know... I love watchin' youngins play with their toys. Girls with their dolls... little boys with their cars or their action figures (which JAC maintains are dolls). But... anyone care to guess what Jeb's current favorites are?

Other little boys are fascinated with Rescue Heros. Not my boy. Nope. He plays with John Deere toys. Johnny Tractor... Barney Backhoe... Allie Gator.... Tony Track Tractor... and the best of all... Corey Combine.

Corey has replaced Thomas the Train in Jeb's bed. This is big stuff man.

For you uninitiated these are smallish personified versions of various John Deere implements. They have eyes and smile. Kids love 'em. Currently all of them but Corey are resting... lined up painstakingly... just so... beneath my vice cabinet... which the boy calls the barn.

I know of little boys who've learned their colors by associating them with various tractor brands. That is a good sign of a well raised boy.

Then again... My boy's only three... and he can point out the differences in a John Deere Model B, and a John Deere Model D. He knows nicknames like "Poppin' John", and "Spoker D" but he preffers to use the older name.. "Johnny Popper."

It's of course occured to me that its time to start tractor shoppin'. When discussing this with JAC the other day... he mentioned the new Farm Alls.

JAC clearly doesn't realize how much damage this would do to my son's perception of his father. It would be like... your dad tellin' you all about the f-350 he was fixin' to buy... and then seein' him drive up in a new minivan. I simply don't think I'd be the same in the boy's eyes. At least not for a long time.

I always dreamed of buyin' a Deere... and it looks like now I'm gonna go with the 27hp 790... but I always figured I'd start out with a Kubota. Hey.. its a lot of tractor for the money... but now?

Nope. Can't chance it. I'll push mow 6 acres if I have to. I'll save up to buy the Deere dammit. Seein' that boy's face when its delivered would be worth it.
Miner Update

There was a breif scare at the hospital on Friday when lots of folks thought the miner died. In fact the poor ol' boy next to him died... it was just some confusion on bed numbers.

For a real update... well... DrWho is handling his anesthesia tomarrow.

Monday, January 16, 2006

Its Official

I'd love to go into all manner of details... but I've been sippin' a little to much rose champagne for all that... see... we've been celebratin'!

We've been from the highest highs to the lowest lows since friday evenin'... but in the end... everything worked out for the best... and the best job... in the best town came through. The good ol' boy in charge decided to sweeten the pot... and in the end... you're better off goin' where the folks are really excited about gettin' ya, than goin' some place where they act like their doin' ya a favour by interviewin' ya.

So...

70 days...

See ya'll in....

THE GREAT STATE OF TENNESSEEE!!!!

Dickson to be specific. Throw one back y'all! It's a helluva night!

Friday, January 13, 2006

ATF

That no account PORCUS started without us boys! By the look of things he's been sippin' on that rum since plum near 4pm! Get on with it! We gots some catchin' up to do.

Actually I shouldn't say we.. I mean y'all. Oh... I'm drinkin', but I have to pace myself tonight. See mom and dad are on the road... on their way up here... and they got Jeb with 'em. They likely won't roll into town until 3am... so it's a marathon instead of a sprint. Who's with me?

I reckon I should start with the basics... and basic it is tonight... Amber Bock. Plain ol' dark lager... but tough to beat on a cool winters night.

On the other fronts I'm kickin' around the idea of building a 1911. Now bear with me here... I know it sounds like a hair-brained scheme... but at least hear me out.

I know a couple of good suppliers where I can get quality inexpensive 80% finished frames. What that means is, the frames aren't done yet. No names or serial numbers... and the slide grooves have not yet been cut. In order to finish the frame, those grooves must be cut. Now... that said, I would need to buy a mini mill... which can be had for under 700 bucks (Harbor Freight has a tempting little unit for $499.00) and a cutting tool which is sold by the same folks that sell the frames.

What do I get for my time and money?

Unmarked... undocumented 1911s. That's what. Best of all... it's perfectly legal...and if they turn out to be good guns.. I can always put my name on them, get an FFL out of my workshop, and call myself a custom 1911 maker.... like Les Baer used to be! Even if I never do that.... How many people can say they made their own 1911? The plan of course is to use a quality frame and slide, then go cheap... and then swap out parts one at a time and document the results... until I eventually come up with an excellent combination. What do ya think? Madness? I see it as a pretty productive hobby myself. Beats the hell outta playin' X-box. I'm still in the research phaze right now... as spare time is hard to come by... and I've already got much time occupied in the job search and planning of Nate and JAC's Excellent Adventure.

Speaking of that... that DR650 is looking better and better...

and smokin'! Damn! I forgot about my smokes! CRAP!

Our beloved Welldigger... who by the way is expected to come along on the adventure... and therefore alter the name... purchased some fine cigars for me. Champagne I believe... mild... but complex... way better than you'd expect for the money. If you're lookin' for a daily smoker that won't affect your driving that may be something to look at....

Now.. Crank up some Chris Ledoux dammit.

WE GOT A FIVE DOLLAR FINE FOR WHININ'
We tell you before you come in
So if it ain't on your mind
To have a good time,
well y'all come back and see us again!
Gregg's Hybrid Motorcycle

Turn up your speakers... Take big drink of whatever's handy... and click here.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Bitten

By now I'm sure you can see that the bug has JAC and I squarely by the balls. We are each at this very moment quite nearly obsessed with our next ride. While troopers from Arkansas to Texas are still talking about our last ride... we expect this one to be quite different.

See kids... I have this fetish... I see these old dirt roads and I always think... "wonder whats down there?" It eats at me. Its like an itch ya just can't scratch.

Well dammit I'm gonna do some scratchin'.

It was I that started JAC down the path of Dual Sport doom... and don't think for a second that I'm not royally pissed that he's the one that ended up with the KLR before I did.

Bastard. I swear... no one will stick a hot poker up your ass like kin.

but I digress... It seems this time we're takin' the roads less travelled... and that's fine with me. 'sept it leaves me in a quandry. I have no mount. JAC's in the same boat... but he'll just go grab another KLR and call it a day.

Me?

I love the KLR. Love it. I used to fantasize about blasting through the mud and muck, and jumping over harleys. But now? Now I find myself looking at two bikes...

The KLR: Those of you who also read Threeway know this bike. Its the John Deere of motorcycles. It is not the fastest... it just runs... forever... and nothing stops it. It has a following like no other vehicle ever produced. Anything you will face has been documented and overcome 1000 times... and someone makes a part that will prevent it. The US Marines ride KLRs. I don't know what else to say.

The XR 650L: Big Red. Truth be told, if you made every modification every KLR guru ever came up with, you'd have something approximating an XR650L.... minus 30 horses... which is about all the KLR makes in the first place. Saying the XR is more capable in the nasty dirt, is rather like saying my CBR 1000 is more capable on the interstate. Double the horse power... a real dirt suspension... 135mph top speed... and a charging system that will handle more than your average LCD clock. Sounds like a no brainer right? Not really. This nasty ol' whore stands 41 inches off the ground at the seat... meaning I'd need a step stool to mount her... sure once I got up there it'd be the ride of my life... but it wouldn't be safe by any stretch. This bitch is packin' some serious heat. If I can lower the thing considerably... I may be picking one up. It would need a new seat for sure. Word is it vibrates much less than the KLR, but gets worse gas milage... and that's not good, because where we're goin', milage matters.

See? Is that nasty or what?

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Parole: T Minus 79 days

Ah.... but who's countin'?

I 'preciate y'all stoppin' by in my absence. Things are still insane, but I thought I'd better drop by and say howdy... maybe let y'all know what's goin'on.

We've spent the last several days in Tennessee interviewing and house shopping. I cannot express how much better this particular job is than the others offered. Its like winning the lottery. Its bloody well insane.

Not to mention its in middle Tennessee... in a great southron town that just happens to be world famous for the celebration of a dearly loved, if under appreciated, farm animal.

We knew we were gonna like this little town when we stopped for lunch at Stan's.... see... I picked up a menu and found that ol' Stan doesn't serve eggs. He serves Aigs. I also learned that Stan only smokes and serves left side hams... as it is an old-timers tale that when a pig scratches his right side, he's actually doing the Charleston... which is quite a workout... and when scratching his left side... he leisurely rubs a tree. Therefore the left side hams are far more tender.

I don't really think there is an ounce of truth in any of that... but the ham was damned tender... and it made me chuckle when I saw the lengthy explaination on the menu. DrWho proclaimed her mashed-taters the best resturaunt taters she'd ever had, and quite nearly compared them to her grand-mama's. This caused a hush to go over the room.

Just walkin' around that little town I had about 25 people wave and say howdy. Now ya see... that's the fundemental difference in the North and South. Its not just that the North is populated almost entirely of idiots... because... hell.... who doesn't like to keep a few morons around? No... the trouble with the north is.... everyone up here is continually pissed off. See? A happy-go-lucky moron is likeable... like Forrest Gump... he's fun to have around... But now... A pissed off idiot? Now see... that's just a bad combination.

Of course... it didn't hurt that it was 80 degrees and sunny... in January. That will change a man's attitude... let me tell ya.

Sunny... I've almost forgotten what that's like. See... You wouldn't believe it... but west Virginia is actually a completely different color that the South. Even when the sun's out... and there's not a cloud in the sky... it's still muted. It's not the bright yellow that I'm used to... there's something else there. The place always has a... a Matrix-like greyness to it. The further north you go in the state... the more noticable it becomes.

79 days.

79 days to freedom... When I shall be shed of this Godless hole once and for all.

Friday, January 06, 2006

Insert ATF Here

We're rollin' for Tennessee. Make yourself at home kids... light one up and sip some bourbon for ol' Nate. Maybe a white russian for good ol' DrWho.

Wild Turkey'll be fine thanks.

Digger... We'll see y'all directly.
Miner Update With A Twist

By now I'm sure y'all know that the miner has been sent to Pittsburgh for "oxygen therapy". I can shed some light on what's going on, and I think you'll find part of it pretty interesting. For example... they're treating him with voodoo medicine.

What's being used is Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy. Basicly they stick him in a chamber with pure oxygen and crank the pressure up. This is used in wound therapy... as well as treating divers with the bends.

Unfortunately...

Dr Scheinkestel published a study on Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy in 1999 which showed that patients who undergo this treatment actually do worse on in neuro psychological performance testing.

Not a good idea boys.

This whole thing has been a fiasco from the moment that miner got to Ruby. The physicians have been falling all over themselves for their brush with fame. Frankly its repugnant, and it has resulted in deficient care for other patients in the ICU and elsewhere.

Specifics can be provided if you like.

study
Interesting. Very Interesting.

Vince Young calls Steve McNair, "Big Papa."

Big Papa was in the stands at the Rose Bowl. He was hugging Mack Brown after the big win. He spent time with Vince before flyin' back to Nashville. Kinda makes ya think doesn't it?

Remember when McNair was lightin' it up at Alcorn State? He was a scrambling QB who had a wierd motion. Some folks thought he should be the first over-all choice... others thought he'd never amount to anything in the NFL.

Sound familiar?

The Titans, the Oilers back then, took a chance on McNair. They had a proven QB... so they benched him.. tore down his throwing motion... rebuilt it... and brought him up to NFL speed. They were patient with him. They developed a huge talent into an MVP level quarterback.

What's changed?

Jeff Fisher is still coaching the Titans... Floyd Reese is still the GM... they have two proven NFL quarterbacks...

Interesting indeed.

McNair as a player/coach.... Billy Volek the starting QB... Bringing Vince along with the young wide outs that did so well this year?

Yes... interesting.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

to Go Pro Mr Young

Vince Young... If you're reading this... and God knows there is no reason for you to be... go pro.

Why?

The only reason an underclassmen should ever come out early... there's no where to go but down. You will be one of the top 3 picks in the draft... maybe the very first choice. That means its time to take what you've earned. Think of your family son. You've done enough for Texas. Time to think of your kids, your family, and yourself.

But there are other reasons on top of that.

This year, a class organization with a winning history needs a young stud QB... and their drafting 3rd. You have a chance son... to go play behind a great offensive line... to throw to a young, talented, excited group of wide recievers... with the best group of tight-ends in the league to bail you out when necessary... and to boot... you've got two NFL proven running backs with you. You can play for a coach and a GM that have been to the Superbowl.

Son... you can study up for year... behind your friend... Steve McNair.... and what can you learn from Mac-9?

You can learn one all important lesson... One lesson that will mean the difference between Super Bowl rings and legend.... and mere highlight real talent...

You can learn to not be Mike Vick.

They may play in your home town... but the Texans don't need you... they need offensive linemen and defense. Besides... do you really want to take David Carr's place behind the worst pass protection in football?

What are your choices? The Texans who don't need you... and might get you killed.... New Orleans? Who don't even know where they are playin' their home games?The Saints? Who look like a franchise that has no idea where its going?

Or do you want to go to the Titans?

Reggie got his Heisman... you got your ring.

Let Reggie get is number 1 overall pick....

You...

You put on that two-tone blue... and get another ring.

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

A Little Clearer Picture

If you're unfortunate enough to be trying to keep up with this story via the mainstream media you probably find yourself furious. You're probably mad about the way the company stuck the families of the miners off in that church and kept them in the dark.

Well... straight from the horses mouth... how about the real story.

Governor Joe Manchin was actually at the church with the family, and he was acting to keep the families up to date. He was there. He was personally making sure the families were getting updates. He was continually in radio contact with the command center. When there was news, it was relayed from the command center to him, and he told the families.

It was a good system, and it was working.

The problem happened around midnight, when Joe was hanging out in the church waiting with everyone else, and all the sudden a cheer goes up. He had a trooper with him, and he asked what was going on. He asked if the trooper had gotten a call. No call had come from the command center. ICG hadn't told anyone anything.

Upon investigating they found that someone (a mine foreman) had called a family he knew at the church and gave them the false information.

Red flags went up. Joe went up to the command center right around midnight to verify the info. When he got there, even the command center was jubilent. It wasn't for another half-an-hour before they learned that all something was inaccurate.

When they found out something was wrong, they decided to keep quiet until they knew for sure exactly what was going on. They didn't know if they had 1 alive... or 12 alive... or 10... or 5... they didn't know. All they knew was it wasn't 12.

As for the lag... it was chaos. They were more concerned with getting medical equipment and personnel down there. There was huge delay due to all the changing of the teams.

Another aspect of this that is being over looked is that calls were made from the command center to the church clergy to say that something was wrong.

The calls were made. Did it take a long time to figure out what was going on? yeah. It did. They were 2 miles deep into a mountain for crying out loud. ICG had a responsible system setup that was working and was keeping the families informed. They were sporatic with their press releases, but frankly I can't blame them. They were more conserned about the miners and the families.
"We Found Them"

The rescuers announced that in a radio communication to the command center. Someone over heard that message... mininterprated it to mean "we found them alive". Then took it upon themselves to call a family they knew at the church. It was the kindergarten rumor game at the worst possible time. Most places are reporting that the families didn't find out for three hours. In fact it was two, and there were rumors circulating around as little as 30-minutes after the initial news.

The families are beside themselves and should be. They're blaming the company.

There's a problem though.

The company didn't tell them, an individual did. The company never told anyone anything. People keep asking what took the company so long to correct the error. I can shed a little light... for one thing the folks in the command center had no idea that the families had been told anything. They hadn't told anyone anything... they were playin' it close to the vest. The local word is a lot of time past before they had any idea that the media was tellin' everyone about a miracle.

Everyone is gonna point a lot of fingers... but the fact is those boys were riskin' their lives tryin' to get to those miners, and they got there in time to save one of them. That's a miracle people. They got someone out of that hell alive.

They didn't miss by much. With better equipment they may have gotten there sooner. That's where folks need to be looking. Do we have the best of the best?

I'll wager we do. But we need to take a hard look at it.

Here in West Virginia its all about blaming the company. Any company... for anything... for everything. In this case... I have doubts about the validity of that blame today.

***Update***

The youngest miner is the one that survived. He's 27-years old and has been mining for 3 years. He's at the hospital here in Morgantown and word is there is no carbon-monoxide in his blood. They're having a press conference about his condition here in a few minutes. A press conference... Hrm... Can someone explain how that's not a HIPPA violation? Patient confidentiality and all that?

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

The Mining Culture

One of the great disappointments of Morgantown has been the way it insulates itself from west Virginia. The town and its people think they are better than west Virginia, and they'd really rather not be associated with the state at all. In conversation, rather than callin' someone a redreck... they'll scrunch up their nose... shake their heads and mutter something about those born in the southern part of the state.

Of course, if you're from Morgantown... everything is the southern part of the state, and everyone in the state is a redneck but you. They want to be New York City so bad they can't see straight.

I've always been fascinated by mines and mining. Bein' born and raised in western Kentucky, my ideas of what's done are pretty different though. See... where I'm from coal mining is strip mining. You just pull out the drag-lines and relocate the earth. That's not how its done up here. Up here its digging. It's tunnels. It's ventilation.

Them what still do the work, and they're damned few, are hard men. They're tough sum-bitches with gravel in their guts. They're mountain folk... which means they ain't really yankees. They're just mountain. I don't care if you're in east tennessee, west north carolina... southern west Virginia, or western Virginia... Hell I don't care if you're from the Adarondaks. Mountain folks are different. The rest of the world is remote and largely insignificant. Laws passed in Charleston or Nashville are mere suggestions to be chuckled about while you're suckin' down a pepparoni roll.

I'd have loved to get to meet some of them ol' boys. I would been proud to hunt with 'em, or share a beer with 'em in some little low rent cliffside bar. Instead I got stuck in high-brow Morgantown.

They found a body down mine. But there's still reason to hope. So say a prayer for them that live... and say a prayer for them that don't.

There's an old miner's song that's appropriate. Not as fancy as You'll Never Leave Harlan Alive. Not as commercial either. But it was written by a crotchety old bastard of a miner, and it ought to be remembered:

Only A Miner
Well a miner has gone to make heaven
his home,
His wife and dear children he left here
alone.

Let men of the union, from this rank
and file
Put an arm of protection around this
dear child.

He is only a miner, was killed
underground.
He is only a miner, and one more is
gone.

Why he was taken, nobody can tell.
His mining is over--poor miner,
farewell.

He leaves his companion and little
ones too,
To earn their own living as all miners do,
Shut off from daylight and those that
he loves.
The boulder that crushed him came
down from above.

He is only a miner, was killed
underground.
He is only a miner, and one more is
gone.
Why he was taken, nobody can tell.

His mining is over--poor miner,
farewell.
His mining is over--dear brother,
farewell.
Mainstream Media Incompetence

I swear... I don't understand how FoxNewsCnnMSNBC can blow stuff this badly so often. This mining accident certainly puts things into perspective.

For example... right now we have foxnews twisting their hands and asking the tough questions... why did it take them 11-hours to get the first rescuers into the mine? Why was the first 911 call made 2 hours after the incident?

Well gawawlee... I wonder...

The rest of the country maybe dumb struck by these things... but the local folks aren't... and I'll bet anyone who knows anything about mining isn't either. First of all the rescue crews and equipment are not everywhere at once. The first step is always rounding up the team. It happens fast, but it still takes time.

After that they have to assess the situation. Sometimes the mine is just not safe enough to enter. You don't kill off a highly trained rescue team trying to save some guys who're already dead. Even still... they were bustin' their asses all day yesterday tryin' to figure out what they could do, but the gas levels in the mine were just to damned high.

These boys are 2 miles into the mine... some 270 feet deep. The rescue workers do carry respirators... but they're only good for 7-hours. In other words... you have to get in, and out in that time.. or you're toast. They couldn't do it. They'd have died trying. It took 11-hours for the gas levels to get down to where the rescue workers could go... and they've been haulin' ass ever since.

Last check they were well over 1.5 miles in.

There have also been rampant reports of fallen debris blocking the rescuers. This is also totally untrue. What's goin' on is simple... the trapped miners have done, or are doing what they were trained to do. They have carbon monoxide testers with them. They are using them. When they find carbon monoxide at dangerous levels, they seal off that area, and retreat to fresh air.

If you can find a local west virginia talkradio station.. turn it on for updates. Otherwise, don't believe a damned thing you hear on TV. These people have no clue.

Are the boys down there alive? We don't have a clue. It's a big place down there, plus they're trained to barricade themselves in. This ain't a rookie crew either. Some of those men have 30 years mining experience.

We'll know when we know.

Until then, take everything ya hear with a grain of salt.