Monday, August 25, 2008

Yipee Ki Yay

It goes without saying that, among the skills I aquired as a child, the ability to easedrop is among my most favoured. In fact... it may be the most widely used skill I possess... and never ceases to provide entertainment in the times and places such is desperately needed.

For example...

Tonight I made a run to Taco Bell... and apparently... so did the rest of the county. While waiting for our food... and mind you... when I see we.. I mean myself... and the lobby full of other folks... I did what I do. I stood facing forward.. blank faced... seemingly in my own world... secretly monitoring the conversations of everyone around me from the workers to the two chicks in the corner.

This is one bit I picked up...

Fat girl: So I guess ya feel pretty bad about Kenny?

Cute girl: Yeah.. I mean... he's hot.. but I've got a boyfriend.

Fat girl: Yeah...

Cute girl: and I don't even mind his wheel chair.. but I mean... ... how do you... I mean... I guess you just climb on.

*** Now at this point I had to look out of the corner of my eye... and I'm so glad I did. Because if I hadn't... I never would've seen the girl twirling the imaginary lasso over her head and pelvic thrusting***

Try as I might.. I couldn't keep a straight face after the fat girl realized I had heard the whole exchange. We both cracked up.... and the cute chick just buried her head in her hands on the counter.

Nate: Aww hell... don't be embarassed darlin'. Why I think its shows a class and an open mind to look past that wheel chair.

Yes... I actually managed to use the word class.

Ain't that just precious?

Reminds me of another tale... though... to protect the innocent I'll change the setting. Suffice to say that a girl was talkin' to some guys about her husband... complainin' about the man's... ummm.. bedside manner. Apparently this fella fancied himself some kinda damned romantic. As I recall she said something like this...

"He's just always so... ***shudder*** soft and gentle. He's always telling me how much he loves me and how sweet I am... and he's looking in to my eyes and petting my cheek and stuff... I mean... dammit... pull my hair! Call me a bitch! Ya know what I'm sayin'?"


We sure do baby.

We sure do.

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