The Coming Doom

So.. you think housing prices have bottomed out? Not even close. Look... and despair.

So what are we looking at? The 100 line is is the 100 year average, inflation adjusted. So its the same house... tracking the price over time.

Now note the spike in the 1890s and the dip following it. Now look at the spike starting in 1998. We must conclude that not only will the price drop down to the 100 line. We must conclude it will drop far far below it... in proportionality to the spike.

Now... I believe we will see another spike before the big dip... but the dip will still come. So if you're buying right now... my advice is simple.

Find out what the peak value of the property was over the last 10 years... and pay no more than half of it. Ideally.. you should pay a third of it.

The End of Awareness

Since when did talking about a problem make it go away? Call me crazy... but don't problems require solutions? Don't they require actual action? Being aware of an existence of a problem doesn't do a damned bit of good if no action is taken to remedy it. So bearing all this in mind... will someone please tell me why I should give a damn about these pink ribbons?

Every year we're bombarded with pink... all through October.

The cynic in me would like to point out that these folks falling all over themselves to parade around in pink are simply looking to cash in by bragging about how sympathetic they are.

Look! I'm a good person! My blog has pink letters this month! Or not...

And consider this article... Now its not enough that Breast Cancer Awareness penetrates every aspect of our lives for a whole damned month... now women have the nerve to feel slighted by its varying forms.

Note this quote from the article:

"But at some point, it seems even worse to use the cover of breast-cancer awareness to make flirtatious, joking statements on Facebook. And why is it only a women’s health issue that seems to come in for this sort of treatment? Have there been any such memes for prostate cancer?"

No. There have been no such memes for prostate cancer... because no one talks about prostate cancer. NFL teams don't wear blue shoes and gloves to promote Prostate Cancer Awareness. Blue ribbons are not plastered all over the world... and special Prostate Edition products do not line the shelves of retailers.

Here is a thought... how about we stop talking about Breast Cancer... and start curing it. How about we stop pretending we're doing something... and actually get something done.

And how about we do it all... a lot more quietly.

Thanks.

Soon to Be Viral

A little background.... An acquaintance of mine... Tim... had a conflict with a teacher over his grade. Apparently the woman was so poor at math she couldn't consistently apply her own grading system. Tim repeatedly demonstrated this to her... and eventually had to go to the

school principle to get satisfaction.

The teacher the sent him this letter.

For the record... Tim still has the letter. This is 100% true.

ATF: Edition 37

Ok... I know what you're thinkin'... there have been a lot more than 36 of these posts.... and you're right.

I turned 37 today.

Now for some reason or another birthdays have always been days that I spend taken stock of things. Where am I? Am I who am want to be?

Oh I know... most men have their mid-life crisis in their 40s... but I don't afford myself that indulgence. A mid-life crisis is something that happens when a man wakes up and realizes he didn't spend his life the way he wanted... or should have. Its the product of unpreparedness. Its what happens when a man has neglected his responsibility to deliberately choose his path.

I can look around and take account of things... and know that this is the path I chose.

So tonight... I'll smoke a cigar my brother gave me a long while back... a Kentucky Gentleman.... hand rolled by an old man that lives up the road from Lexington. I'll sip a little 46... Its a life most everyone would love to have... so I will appreciate it.

I live with my family. I raise, and teach, my kids. I haven't had a job in almost 10 years.

I have no idea where this road I am on leads... but I know I chose the road... even if I am thankful to He who lead me to choose it.

I won't be around to comment much... but I would appreciate it if you'd drink with me tonight. Light a cigar. Sip some fine bourbon. Consider it a favor to an old man.

Recycling is the Opiate of the Masses

That's all. I thought it up... and I wanted to say it in big letters.

Now someone make me a t-shirt.

ATF

A: Makers Mark 46. Yes. I'm obsessed. Try it. Trust me.

T: Twist. If you know what it is.. you know. If you don't... you don't. this particular one soaks in bourbon in a zip lock bag. Notice a theme here?

F: Ruger Vaquero... .44mag. Sometimes a big shiney gunslinger rig just feels right.

Raise your hand if you own a single six. Anyone? My vaquero is in the same caliber as a winchester model 94.. so I am pretty set for cowboy action shooting if I were to ever take it up... but its not my thing. Round these parts though.. they make great deer and boar gun because the brush is so damned thick. Never seen pines this tight.

So lets have it boys.. who has cowboy guns?

Objects of Need and Desire

and low... the quest for the right tractor begins.

Now I would love to pretend I know everything about tractors. Sadly.. i would truly be pretending. Truth is I don't own any kind of tract or at all... nor have I ever. I have driven a few and used a loader some.. but not much. The tractor experience in my immediate clan is limited to JAC's abused, and over worked, and much beloved Farm All.

Its cute enough but there is just no way something like it would serve my purposes... which involve actually using a tractor... as opposed to merely working on one. For this reason Green tractors are nearing the bottom of the list.

The top of the list?

I give you.. the Kubota L4400. 44hp 4wd... 36 pto hp... and pure unadulterated sexy. Admit it girls... this is hot.

One could argue that 'Bota has taken over the american compact tractor market. Ya see more orange than green these days... and since the american made tractor is all but extinct (yes.. all JD tractors below 100 hp are manufactured else where) ya can't really wave the flag and shout buy american. Ain't no american to buy. The 'Bota ain't perfect. There is a tractor out there that has its number in a couple categories... including price.

The Bobcat CT440. Pretty ain't she? Oh its true... the kubota has a superior dealer network.. and made in japan is better than made in korea... but the Bobcat's loader is faster and lifts more weight than the 'bota. The Bobcat is also faster in forward.. while the 'bota is faster in reverse. Bobcat doesn't even make 2wd tractors... and all of their tractors are hydrostatic.

In truth I will almost certainly end up with one Kubota or another... but props to Bobcat for making it interesting.

Deep Fried Burger

Only in the South would someone cover an entire cheeseburger in beer batter and deep fat fry it. Yes.. they had cut the fries every day... and yes... there are cute waitress that bring you beers... and sweet tea.

No atf tonight... because... well damn... look at that thing. I still have the buzz from eating it. Ok.. a few landsharks... so I'm not totally honest. Sue me.

Makers Mark 46

For the last 52 years... Makers Mark has had exactly 1 product. By contrast... Jim Beam has a whole catalog of fine small batch bourbons that prove they actually do know how to make good bourbon... but continue to produce crap in large quantity out of sheer spite.

Several years ago... Bill Samuels decided it was time to offer something new. He was particular though... he didn't want to just... leave something in the barrel longer... or change the amount of water added... That's fine for everyone else... but it doesn't advance the state of the art.

So they started the process by taking the Makers Mark finished product... and deciding how they wanted this new batch to be different.

After much stress and experimentation... They settled on a method. They would take some of their standard Makers... that was almost ready for bottling... then rebarrel in... placing charred oak staves in the barrels with it.

Bill describes the result as a cousin to Makers.

Me?

Its more complex... and the flavors that you love in Makers... the caramel and vanilla... they are brighter in 46. There is a spiciness here to that's not found in the original.

The verdict?

This is damned good bourbon. Damned good.

Well Its about Damned Time

Finally! Finally we get our flying cars.

"The two-seater Transition can use its front-wheel drive on roads at ordinary highway speeds, with wings folded, at a respectable 30 miles per gallon. Once it has arrived at a suitable take-off spot - an airport, or adequately sized piece of flat private land - it can fold down the wings, engage its rear-facing propellor, and take off. The folding wings are electrically powered."

Well this is freakin' awesome. We'll be the Jetsons in no time.

I'll be needing mine in black please.

Man Jewelry

Before you even ask... the answer is no.

No. No. No.

We don't wear jewelry. For our purpose jewelry is defined as anything you wear purely for looks that serves no other function. So for example... cuff links are not banned by this rule because cuff links, like belts, are required by some attire to function. Tie tacks can similarly be allowed. Watches are obviously allowed, as they serve a function.

Another notable exception are historically accepted cultural items. For catholics... a St Something-or-other (The Patron Saint of Slow Recall... he's not very famous) medallion or a rosary. These items should be worn with care though... as its a very thin line. The religious necklaces I mentioned for example shouldn't be seen. If we see it to much... we assume you're not wearing for any religious or cultural significance... you're wearing it to make yourself feel pretty.

There are two other exceptions worth noting... gifts symbolic of some enormous life altering event... this is wear wedding rings come in... and jewelry won or awarded for some actual achievement, or to denote membership. So...Super Bowl Rings are completely acceptable. You won your Fantasy Football league? good enough. Your lodge grants you a certain level and you are to wear a ring to denote that level.... fine. You're a marine and you want a ring that says "marine" in gold.... I would rather see ya get a tattoo but I don't think the jury would convict.

Now this is an important post. I wrote it because the bastard jewelry makers have gotten tricky on us. See... Men don't give a damn about flashy gold jewelry. Historically... except for the dandies among us... its not been particularly bothersome to ignore jewelry.

I am seeing things slacken up though. I see guys with black titanium rings with carbon fiber inlays. Its black... therefore its masculine... and look! Carbon Fiber! Oh its true... Carbon Fiber draws in sport bike guys like bugs to a zapper. But look up here at the rules. Do you see any exception made for jewelry that is made with masculine materials? No. I don't care if its tungsten. I don't care if its got titanium cables on it... or black diamonds that were formed in a super nova. Yes.... that's all cool. And when you do something... achieve something... then someone can buy it for you... and then you can wear it.

Otherwise you're just wearing it to look pretty... so it may as well be carbon fiber panty hose. Or italian shoes.

Insulting Fathers Day

Now let me preface this by saying... it is in no way a reflection on my own Fathers Day.... nor how my family treated me. I was honoured quite a bit today and am appreciative of it. And while I am at it...

Happy Fathers Day pop.

That said...

I am thoroughly sick of the way dads are attacked on Fathers Day.... especially at Church. Not surprisingly... the female dominated Church is fairly hostile to fathers. At no time is this more obvious than on fathers day.

Lets start by looking at Mothers Day. Now... Sermons on both days have formulas that are almost always followed... but in each case... are slightly different. On mothers day... women will be celebrated and praised to the point of near worship. Mary will be mentioned over and over again. Then... in the sermon... the minister will take some particular positive attribute of mothers... and use it as a lesson... and hold it up as something for everyone to aspire to.

Then Fathers Day comes along. its a whole different story. It often starts with a mens breakfast... where an old man will stand up and read a list of fatherly attributes... and its assumed of course that you don't meet them... then you are chastised for not meeting them... and challenged to meet them in the future.

Then the service rolls around... and everyone will lament the failures in society and blame them on who? Right. Dads. And then the formulaic sermon... of course there will be no mention of Joseph... no... instead the minister takes a negative attribute of males... this morning at my church it was pride... and complains about how it affects the family of fathers... and uses it as a negative example to show people something to avoid. At my church the preacher threw in the added bonus of complaining that his dad didn't tell him he loved him... and prayed to God that he would never end up like that. What a great way to honor your father... to lead a congregation in prayer that you should never suffer from his faults.

I've been to Baptist churches... Catholic churches... Church of Christ churches... and holy roller churches... and all of them follow these same formulas on fathers day and mothers day... but that's ok.. I'm certain there are exceptions. I just wish I could be at one some time.

But if you're a minister... and you're reading this... here's some advice for Father's Day next year. Just say, "Thanks Dad."... and shut the hell up.

ATF

Ya know... as one that generally don't like people... I can reliably be counted on to avoid crowds and groups in general.... on account of the fact that they are made up of people. Still... I have been been taken aback by the hospitality of the folks in this little town.

Its hard to beat a night at a cookout with good folks... and well... if you ever get a chance to drink beer with the mayor of a small southern town... I highly recommend it.

Its not to say that I didn't love Dickson County... we did... and still do. But these folks have gone so far out of their way to make us feel like a valued part of the community... even before we'd gotten our furniture arranged.

Anyway.... My wife had to stifle her shock as I was seen drinking beer from a can. But at least it was Yuenglings lager. Not bad.

So that's got the A taken care of.... how about the T? Any suggestions? Anyone smokin' an onyx out there? Arturo maybe? if so I'm jealous as hell. Oh wait... look here... its a Romeo y Julietta... Yeah I'm slumming it.

F? Anyone handled the new taurus polymer wheel guns? What say you? Blasphemy? Or a great idea for lightweight heavy punch concealment?

Debt is Not Money

There is a lot of hand-wringing right now about something called "debt deflation". See... some folks... like our beloved Vox Day... think that debt deflation is a legitimate deflationary force that will render any inflationary force ineffective.

I want to explain why they're wrong.

Remember first what we're discussing here... its the size of the money supply... its a measurable... theoreticly anyway. Unfortunately in order to measure something you have to agree on what you're measuring. We don't.

Consensus is that debt is indeed part of the money supply. Consensus, typically, is wrong.

Debt is not part of the money supply and cannot be counted as such. Lets examine it.

Lets say you lend me 1000 dollars... and I go buy something with it. You handed me 1000 dollars in cash... or you wrote a check... or the money was transfered... whatever. In some way 1000 dollars was transfered to me. That money... has just been accounted for in the money supply. Even if you're a bank and you have the privilege of pulling money from thin air. Once it hits my accounts it is accounted for in what we call M2. The real money supply. Now... you have also added 1000 dollars in your accounts receivables... a debt. So that's a total of 2000 dollars. But wait... only 1000 exists. The debt doesn't exist. Its just future money that I pay you... that will be accounted for in the accounts of future M2. If you count the 1000 debt in the money supply... you've counted the same money twice. That's just bogus.

So... this is why debt deflation... is not a real deflationary force. See... sure... numbers are getting smaller.. but it doesn't matter... because they weren't real anyway. its like complaining that the supply of monopoly money is shrinking. its an oddity sure... but it doesn't matter.

on the other hand... governments handing out trillions of real dollars going into real accounts... that is in fact inflationary. Very inflationary. No amount of disappearing monopoly money will ever mitigate its effect.

Debt deflation is only scary to the bankers who are realizing that their accounts receivables are not nearly as reliable as they had assumed.

You can't spend debt. You can borrow money... you can sell debt... but think about what whores sell every day. Is that money to?

I think I am gonna write up an accounts receivable for 2 trillion dollars.... I will just pull it outta my butt. Then I'll wad it up and throw it away... cause no one is gonna pay it. Vox and the deflationistas will no doubt catch the vapors over the devastating effects to the money supply. Its ridiculous I know... just as ridiculous as counting debt in the money supply.

Now... clever Josh asks... "wait... you deposit 100 dollars.. and the bank turns it into 950 dollars of loans.. and the money supply is not increased?"

Says I...

Of course its increased.. but each of those loans had a payout. Someone received the new money at which point it was accounted for in the M2. So the m2 increased by 950 dollars. But it did not increase by 1900 dollars. You can count the money in the accounts. You cannot count the debt created. So in the future.. when the dead beats refuse to pay the loans back... you can't claim its deflationary. It isn't deflation. The 950 dollars is out there...in various accounts... just not the banks.

The Thrill is Gone

Ok... when MSNBC is ripping Obama... ya know the mulatto messiah has lost it. Fox didn't slam the speech nearly this bad. But I suppose its the same old story. The democrats eat their own. So guess what's for dinner?

Imagine... it was just two years ago that Chrissy Matthews was giggling about a chill running up his leg when the messiah spoke.

The Return of the Blogger Blaster... ATF style

What a day... what a week. Holy crap people.

So its been two weeks since I had reliable internet access... I was 10 days without phone or tv. it was like 1930 or something... Considering the economy... a lot like 1930. Regardless... its all handled now. So lets get this atf thing rolling.

A: Landshark for starters... Bookers later tonight. There's really not a lot more to say than that is there?

T: If I'm bein' honest I ain't picked out my cigar yet. I'll have to throw an update on here a little later.

F: As always... Steyr M40... SU-16... Winchester Defender. Now be advised... I'm in serious ninja mode tonight. Tonight... I was breaking down boxes with a smith and wesson tactical knife. Somewhere around box number 278... I noticed a big nasty yellow jacket walking around. Little bastard was givin' me the evil eye... walking around on the one of the boxes. I flicked the knife. THWAK!!!!

Cut the little bastard's head off.

His decapitated body was stuck to the blade... and still moving around pretty good. I brought it into the kitchen and showed it off for the boys who are now convinced their dad is somekind of samurai warrior.

As it should be.

Anyway... time to find that cigar boys... Y'all have a good one.

Moving Time

Well boys its time for the Blogger Blaster's Delta Tango Base to shut it down and sign off. We'll be without home internet access for several days. Blogging from the phone is entirely possible but I will likely be far to busy to do so. If I can... I will. Otherwise... the next significant update will occure in about a week... from the new Beta Alpha HQ.

Light'em if ya got 'em... and sip a little Makers for me.

Blogger blaster signing off.

For now.

Then He Returned!!!!

Ok not really. I'm still on the road... in some little town in north Georgia. I wanted to post some pics though of my latest solo ride. JAC apparently sprained a felopian tube and couldn't come with me... so its just me. No worries.

This old covered bridge was apparently featured in a movie in 1951. I do believe all of them have been.

Not far passed the covered bridge I found the first winery. I may have had a sample... or two. And... I learned a great deal here. Aparently... wineries are where you go to pick up chicks. Who knew? Now understand... I will not divuldge which winery this episode took place at.

So I walk in... and of course... there are two cute chicks behind the wine bar looking to hand out free wine. At the bar are two attractive women in the low to mid thirties... who have... had a few samples. Perhaps... quite a few.

I successfully avoided the wiles of those particular harpies... but the wenches behind the counter proved to be far more challenging. The brunette serving samples was shameless in her flirting. Which of course was horribly offensive to one as noble and upright as I... but as forward as she was... the blonde cashier was her better.

So I picked out the perfect bottle for my beautiful wife... and attempted to pay for it... things went downhill from there.

Cashier Harpy: So... You ride a BMW.

....

Ooo... its red. That's a really pretty bike. Ya know my favorite professor in college rode a BMW.

Brunett Harpy suddenly appears and says, "You mean the one you were screwing?"

...

"She has a thing for motorcycles... especially red motorcycles. So watcha up to today?"

I would like to point out that at this point I haven't spoken a word. These women are good.

"Out riding around the mountains girls... decided to stop in and pick up a bottle for my wife."

Now... that was a dumb thing to say. Oh sure.. some of you are thinking that should've warned them off. Of course... the married men amongst us know better.

Now it was the blonde's turn... "aww... that's sweet... so you're off on your own today then?" Brunette... on demand... blushes and laughs and acts shocked that she'd be so forward.

Time to go. Palms are getting sweaty. Not good. These she-devils probly have bodies stacked up in a freezer in the back somewhere. Still.. a man has to leave an impression...

"There was a time girls."

Then I reached out and mussed their hair... and said, "But I just ain't as good as I was back then..."

Everyone had a good laugh and the blonde gave me a hug.... afterwich I was allowed to pay for my wine and escape with my soul safely intact.

This sight was only partly as terrifying as the girls in the winery.

I stumbled across this while I was out riding around. Apparently these falls were discovered by a Confederate Captain while he was out on a ride to. He named them after his only child... Anna Ruby.

The roads have been fabulous. Sorry I don't have more time to write. Smokes are calling my name.

Y'all be safe. I'll check in tomarrow.

YouTube - Cadillac Sky "Born Lonesome"

YouTube - Cadillac Sky "Born Lonesome"

Epic. Glorious. Awesome.

Warning: do not listen without booze near by.

WTF?

So a while ago I posted a little tidbit about the IRS buying short barrelled shotguns. Several poo-pooed to the post.

No doubt the news that the Department of Education is also ording 26 short barrelled remington shotguns will be met in a similar manner.

After all... why shouldn't the Department of Education have shotguns?

Duh.

Day 4: On the Greens with DrWho

Lets start with some general observations:

1) Vail is huge. Have I said that already? Over 5000 skiable acres on 2 mountains. The longest run... Riva.. is a black that is over 9 miles long.

2) Yankees. Pure Bred True Blue Yankees. Everywhere. Everyone is from New York City... or they're from Jersey and they "work in the city".

3) Rich yankees are dicks. I have seen at least 3 huge blowups over entirely trivial matters. This morning I was getting the boys ski boots from the storage girls... now there are two chicks at the window... you bring them your shoes and your id card... they go get your ski boots and store your shoes for the day. Simple right? So it just so happened that two guys walk up to the window at the same time... both with multiple pairs of shoes to swap for boots. So both girls were occupied.. they were doing their job.

This fat yankee with a revolting new york accent walked up to the window and immediately starts bitch, "Where ah the fucking girls? There's supposed to be two girls here. HELLO?? HELLO?? "

I'm watching this... and couldn't help myself...

"Dude. are you on vacation?"

The yankee looks at me... and says, "Who are you? I'm here to ski."

"Yeah so its a ski vacation then? So you're here to have a good time. So maybe you settle down."

The idiot yankee wasn't impressed, "I'll settle down when I get some service in here. These lazy fucks never do their jobs."

"Dude. There are kids all around you. Settle down. There are two chicks back there working their butts off. they'll be up here as soon as they get the 8 pair of boots these two guys over here sent them to get."

about that time a chick lugged four pair of ski boots up to the window and asked if she could help the idiot yankee.. who could only say, "its about time. get me my boots."

Now let me just point out... in a civilized society it would be perfectly legal and appropriate to beat the hell out of that fat bastard. Sadly... we don't live in a civilized society. and again... this is one example. I've seen it over and over again. The staff here has the costumer service edition of battered wife syndrome.

4)My wife is a badass. She had a tweeked knee from a fall yesterday... so she was hurtin' pretty bad when she put a lot of weight on it... you know... like you do when you turn? Well today she found herself at the top of a long... long... slope. Its vail green... but east coast blue... and you don't over shoot it.. because over that ledge at the bottom is a double black. or as I prefer to call it... certain death. Anyway... her leg really took her confidence and she kept looking down that looong run... a run more difficult than anything she'd done yesterday. I was watching from the bottom... but sure enough she came right on down. Smooth and in control... but slightly pissed off. From there it was catwalks trying to make our way to lions head until we hit the last section down... which is blue. Julie took it like a champ this time... great control... great technique... poll turns and everything. When I saw her at the bottom I thought she was gonna explode. She was so fired up that she'd been able to do it... worth the trip. Many adults never get that feeling... some of us need it so badly we dream up crazy schemes to experience it... regardless... when you get it... cherish it.

5) Jeb is better than he's getting credit for at ski school... because he refuses to play their reindeer games. He stops and turns very well... but they expect him to spend the day poking along... and he wants to go. I mean.... GO. so the instructor today told me as long as he was right with Jeb... he did the little slalom thing perfect... but if he wasnt... Jeb would take off flying down the mountain. He doesn't want to promote Jeb to the next level... even though he admits all the skills are there. This is mildly frustrating to me. The showing off indicates to me that he's bored and needs moved up. On the other hand... these are probably some of the best instructors in the world.

6) Eli is dealing with altitude sickness. But he's a trooper. He's having a blast at Ski School and doing very very well. He's stopping and turning.. and would be up on the mountain every day if he weren't sick. He was so tired he literally slept the whole afternoon session away... taking the world's most expensive nap. still I cannot fault the school. They handled it exactly the way I would have wanted them to.

7) I have a ton of pictures... but again... this stupid wireless network's upload speeds are so lame it times out before even one picture makes it to the blog. This is infuriating.

8) On the family friendliness scale... this place is a solid 10. The only complaint is the yankees... and you can take steps to insulate your exposure to them. You'd be amazed how fast they stop their idiotic nattering when you start talking about guns.

Day 3: Blue on Black

I am at this point moved to wonder if our dear Spacebunny has actually skiied Vail. As she protests that "its not even the best skiing in North America". The dear girl is, in this one rare case, flatly wrong.

It is the best skiing in North America.

Today was insane... fresh powder... feet of fresh powder... and more coming. Glorious.

The first timers were moved to compare different ski areas... Breckenridge is to small... and black at "Breck" is a blue at Vail. A-basin and Copper Mountain don't even compare. I mean if you want to ski the same 4 runs all day.. fine... If you want to spend days on the mountain and never see the same trails... then you have to come to Vail. Greens? All day. Blues? All day. Blacks? All day. Double blacks and backcountry? Forever.

So it was blues today.. and my first blacks... Not east-coast blacks either. Blacks. I was feelin' pretty impressed with myself too... bouncing down.. pole turns... completely smooth and controlled....

Then this line of 5 year olds blew by me.

WTF?

The snow was up to their necks! God that was depressing.

Anyway... Boys made mad progress today and they'll both be on greens on the mountain tomarrow. Big stuff. Julie progressed from level 1 to level 4 in one day. That's pretty hard core in my opinion. We're skipping the lessons tomarrow as we both know the mountain well enough now for some exectutive skiing together tomarow... which should hopefully mean...

PICTURES!

And... if all of this hasn't been glorious enough... I met one of the 10th mountain soldiers that helped open this place up.

Vail Day 2: The first day on the slopes

Holy crap dude.

So the boys spend the day in ski school. They are both standing up and stopping consistantly... and Jeb is able to turn pretty well. Another day of ski school and they'll be monsters. We had the geared up big time. We spent a ton of cash on the gear... but it was worth it. It was -8 with a windchill of -26... and they were both fine. In fact... both said they got a little hot.

yeah baby. yeah.

As you can imagine when we got back to the hotel I got all manner of demonstrations of various stopping and turning manuevers. Jeb also protested bitterly that he was not allowed to go down the black diamonds.

DrWho and I also spent the afternoon in ski school... her as a beginner... and me as advanced. She was very pleased with her progress and had a great deal of fun. And of course... in the advanced course I was in... we did what one calls "executive skiing."

If you're unfamiliar... "Executive Skiing" describes a certain style... where one gets to the slopes about... 9:45.... hits some lazy blues and greens... then has a nice leisurely lunch by the fire for an hour or two.. then its back to the greens and lazy blues till about 3... then its time to retire for cocktails by the fire. Relaxed as it was... I was very disappointed to find myself sweating.

Still I am very much impressed by the Executive Skiing.... as it allows for signifant time for reading by the fire.... and Pride and Prejudice, and Zombies is fairly difficult to put down.

As for Vail itself... its staggering. First of all there are well over 200 named runs. 200. The layout is simply stupendous. Its such that even a hardcore seasoned skier could spend a day piddling around greens and blues and be perfectly satisfied... simply because of the way the terrain varies. You can ski for 7 hours straight... never hit the same slope twice... and never be even remotely close to lost. Considering the size of the places.. that's pretty amazing.

Needless to say... we're miserable.... we hate it... you should never come here.

Vail

In a few hours we're boarding a plane for Denver. From there its a bus to Vail... where we'll spend the next week at the Cascade Resort. This is a little stunning to me... as I can honestly say I never thought I'd get to ski the Rockies.

I'd done a lot of skiing... but east of the Mississippi its a very different thing. Its far more like sliding down a sheet of ice than actually slashing through powder. I've always wondered what it would be like to actually be able to stop.

The laptop is going with me... so you should look forward to being tormented with pictures and tales over the next week.

Come along for the ride boys.

Some Things You Never Expect To See

So my brother... who I was certain was straight... was confessing his desires to me tonight... rationalizing his sickening and perverse desires for various electronic readers... when he said this:

JAC:
I think I'll wait for the ipad.

Thought For The Day

If the government can force me to wear a motorcycle helmet to keep insurance rates down, then it can force your fat ass onto a tread mill for 3 hours a day for the eact same reason.

Let's see what the Fat Pride folks think of that slippery slope.

"Fear the Boom and Bust" a Hayek vs. Keynes Rap Anthem

Dude... I hate rap... hate it. But this is one of the 10 most awesomest things on the nets.

Heap Bad Ju Ju Mon

So I'm browsing around the internets minding my own business when I find this. Apparently they're looking for 60 remington 870s... parkerized... 14-inch barrels... wilson combat ghost ring sights.

Anyway...

Might better make sure that 1040EZ is in the mail in time.

Sleep well tonight.

Purchase Patterns... and Perverts.

Browsing through Amazon.com almost always results in some comedic gem. This particular item won't disappoint. Oh not the item itself of course... no the fun is to be found when you scroll down to the "People who purchased this also purchased"...

Who knew the communion crowd was so ummm.... impassioned?

Wafers... check.

Wine... check.

Anal Lubricant... check.

Uh Oh...

Looks like the Mad Aussie has some explaining to do.

I do believe... he's been Baaaaaahhhhhhhd.

So What Are You Gonna Do?

I have a friend that's going to summit Mt. Rainier this year.

I'm gonna ski Vail for the first time. Other than that... I haven't decided... but I know I will do something extraordinary in 2010... and it will involve a firearm or a motorcycle... or most likely... both.

But what?

That's me today. That's where I am. Ride to.... where?

The Big One is still out there. The one JAC and I always talk about... but seems just to impossible to consider. The ride to the Arctic Circle. It would be our first international ride. It would be an extreme ride to be sure... but what's the point of perfecting your long distance skill... if you don't ride long distances?

He has a GS. I have an RT. Why on earth shouldn't we ride to the arctic circle? Well.. besides the fact that it will take a month... And don't we have to finish the Trans Am Trail first? Maybe that's it.

But what about Africa? Couldn't I go hunt in Africa?

Or couldn't I just go to Texas and hunt a russian boar with a knife?

Or maybe I could have a fourth son?

Or...

That's a big damned word for just two little letters. But or... no... not or... how about... perhaps... yes...

Perhaps....

Perhaps.... I just do what I always do.

And try to take over the world.