Friday, February 16, 2007

ATF

How's it goin' boys? Its been a helluva a day down here in Tennessee I tell ya what... colder than dammit... I ain't seen my nuts in 3 days I swear. S'ok though... s'posed to be in the 60's next week. That's why the South rules right there.

Well... its Friday night... drink up boys... may as well get to it.

What are we talkin' about tonight? Oh yeah... I remember... Crom done got me fired up talkin' about some piece of shit rifle... got me thinkin'... which is dangerous... about guns I can't stand. Hell we talk all the time about guns we love. What about the ones we hate? I know you've got at least one that just irritates the shit out of ya by its mere existence. Lets here it!

Me?

Well... Lets make a list...

1) Ruger Mini-14. Calling it a piece of shit is disrespectful to excremint everywhere. You should never call a damned gun smith to work on one... you should call a plumber. Its about as accurate as a blowgun with bent darts. Not to mention its butt ugly. I have no idea where they got the action for this thing... I'm convinced some Ruger accountant found it a chinese company's reject pile and decided to have them make a bunch of them real cheap... I don't know for a fact its pot mettle... but it sure as hell seems like it. I'm suprised its not sold at home depot next to the solder irons and flux. Rest assured... if I ever own a gun shop... I'm going to ban these rifles from my store. Bring one in at your own peril. Plumber is up the street.

2) Ruger P Seriers. Skies blue... water's wet... these pistols suck. The springs break for crying out loud. How does that happen? Seen it 3 times now. Not only that... the mags fail... and the gun has a remarkable tendency for inaccuracy. Can we throw ugly in the mix to? Oh yes we can. Not to mention.. the ergonomics suck. This is in fact the perfect cop gun. Why? because they never shoot... and if they ever shoot at you... they're damned near guaranteed to miss. Junk Junk Junk.

3) Remington 700. Nothing screws up a pretty gun like a cheap control lever. Remington has the cheapest looking one I've ever seen. Toasters from the 1970's had better looking levers than the clunky looking safety on the 700. Sticks out like a sore thumb. Every time I look at one my eye goes straight to that ugly damned saftey. And how about the big claw extractor on the 700? oh..no.. that's right... it doesn't have one... it has this girly looking hook that looks like something Winchester would put on a lever gun. Speaking of lever guns...

4) Winchest Model 94. This is odd because I actually have two of them and I like shooting them. One's in.22 mag... and the other is in .44 mag. Both very useful rifles. Both accurate and fun. So why do I hate them? History. I could do a 3000 word post on why the Winchester Model 94 is inferior to the Savage 99... or I could post pictures of their actions side by side. Either would be just as convincing. The US military's storied history of buy cheaper inferior weapons... even when far superior weapons are competitively priced, starts here. At least I think it does. The Gun That Won the West should've been my all-time favorite rifle... the Savage Model 99.

5) Glocks. All of them. Duh.

6) Desert Eagle .50. Why does this gun exist? Someone tell me. Is it just to sell to idiots who don't realize how useless it is?

What about you?

Oh... um... 4 bud ices... and now on to the bourbon... unknown which fine bottle I shall choose this night.

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