Monday, March 14, 2005

The Fear of Lettin' Down Your Kin

This is the sad story of lessons learned the hardway.

This was... Christmas time... somewhere around... I dunno... 1991? JAC, 'Digger, me, and by buddy Dan got together in our old hometown of Owensboro, KY to do some bowlin', drinkin' and carryin' on.

We found our way to this bowlin' alley on the outskirts of town... and commenced to havin' us a big time. Now that I think about it... this is really the last time the three of us went out drinkin'. That's probly best... but I digress...

While we were there... I admit we were actin' a fool. We were commentin' on Digger and Dan's girly bowlin' techniques.... basicly the night degenerated into a fryer's ball... and the guest was whoever's turn it was to bowl.

As you can well imagine... our language was pretty course... and our comments tended to be... well.. fairly vulgar. So much so that the drunk rednecks, and their standard redneck chicks... you know the type... one ultra young and hot, the other fat and skanky, in the next lane were startin' to take offense.

We didn't really think to much of it... their women... and I use the term loosely... were gettin' a bit uppity... and I noticed JAC and Welldigger were well... them two... they ain't to much for takin' shit off anyone... least of all a couple skanks.

One us... Probly digger... leaned way back in his seat.. so as to insure he was heard by the offending parties... and said somthin' along the lines of, "You know... if they don't like it, they can have a coke and a smile, and shut the @#$ up."

That escalated things abit... but not to the point of a confrontation... we just decided to finish our game, and leave. JAC and Digger were both pretty drunk... so we paid, and headed on out to the car.

Since they were drunk, JAC threw me the keys... and we went on out to the boat. Hey... it was 1991 Caprice Classic. Boat better describes this particular vehicle.

Anyway... It was colder than a witches' titty... in a iron bra... face down in the snow! So I put the key to the Corvette in the lock... and it won't turn. I try it again... wont unlock. I hit the unlock button on the remote... battery's dead on the remote.

So I'm trying in vain to open the door of a Caprice Classic with the key to a Corvette... convinced that the lock is frozen... when our friends from inside show up.

I should describe these boys... First of all... there were four of us... and four of them. A conservative estimate would say that on average.... each of them had 50 or 60 pounds on each of us.

The biggest was a blonde haired dude... about 6'3" and about 245. He was a big ol' boy.. and each of them was over 200 pounds easy.

The biggest of us... Dan... was about 165. Not good.

The big ol' boy walks up behind JAC, and before we know we're in a fight...


Right in the nose. JAC spins around facing the car... and I remember... in the calmest voice he said, "Now you didn't have to go and do that." The he spun around and threw a nasty right-hook that I do believe connected... in spite of the fact that JAC was now blind as bat from his newly broken nose.

That's when I saw the fist coming at me from the corner of my right eye.


Why am I seeing stars? Why am I laying down? Where am I? is this the hood of a car? Why does my ear hurt?

I look up to find that I am in fact laying on the hood of the caprice. I have no idea how I got there... All I remember is getting hit... then seeing stars.

Digger says he saw a dude throw me up onto the car. I have no idea what happened... that's as plausible as anything else. Reckon dude just figured I was done.

Anyway.. by the time I came to my senses JAC and the biggest of them were throwin' down. One had turned chickenshit, threw up his arms when Digger got sideways of him.. and about that time I realized the one who'd sucker punched me was standing in front of the car.

I thought of the fancy elephant skin boots I was wearin', and promptly put the heel of my right one square into his sternum.

He hacked, weezed, and stumbled over towarded JAC who was now on one knee... for some reason.. he was tryin' to take his jacket off. I jumped off the hood of the car and took about three quick steps back just see if I could figure out just what in the hell was goin' on.

Here was the situation. JAC's on his knees scrappin' with the Monster of the group. The one I just kicked stumbles over to JAC who's blind as a bat... The poor bastard... He just got kicked in the chest... and now... JAC's grabbed him by the balls! Hell... JAC couldn't see a thing... he didn't realize who he had... he thought he had the fella that was hittin' him... he had know idea there were two... and fixin' to be three of them! The one that backed away from Digger now ran over to help with JAC... Apparently two on one wasn't enough... and I see digger turn psycho.

He shouts "GET OFF HIM!" and kicks the coward in the back! Where the hell is Dan? I take two steps toward the fray when a fat chick jumps in front of me.

What the hell?

Apparently it wasn't enough that we had these 4 big ol' boys on us... their chicks were gonna help to. Great.

Out of suprise I stopped, turned sideways and almost threw a punch... then I realized it was the fat chick from iside.

Over her shoulder I see this little girl, the hot one from inside... rush at JAC. By now, the one guy who had his nuts squeezed, and his sternum kicked in has also taken a couple shots to the throat and was limping away... not lookin' to good... That left two for Digger, and the biggest one... well, he was windin' up for a kill shot on JAC...

That's when JAC noticed the hot girl runnin' at him. He hunkers down to kinda deflect her impact... and ***CRUNCH***.

I tell ya... it was a sickening sound. This 240 pound dude, had just wound up, and crushed this girl right in the face.

She took his kill shot. Her head whipped back and she dropped like she'd been blasted by a 10-gauge.

The fat chick in front of me looked like she was gonna be sick. We both saw that girl's head thrown back... to a degree that your neck just don't bend on its own.

Big man doesn't have any idea what just happened... none of them do... one of them thinks JAC hit the chick and is about to freak when we all hear sirens and see blue and red flashes. That's when three guys ran off, carryin' one girl, and with a fat girl chooglin' along behind... and then the one guy limped off... real slow... holdin' his sack... and not breathin' real good.

We were smaller than they were... and we were out-numbered... because the biggest among us had R-U-N-N-O-F-T to call the law... and if I remember correctly... two of them had fixed blade huntin' knives in their belts.

We came out ok all things considered. JAC had a broke nose... which wasn't so bad except for the humilation of bleedin' all over everything... Digger came out with some scratches and bruises, but he definately gave better than he got. I had a swole up ear and scratches here and there... but for the most part, besides a punch and kick, I wasn't really involved.

I don't really understand why the biggest one of us chose to run off and call the cops...

Anyway... The benefit of livin' in a small town is that everyone knows ya. Turns out the cops who showed up went to Highschool with JAC. None of us will ever forget what he said when he found out who was scrapin' with us...

"Hell... sounds to me like you boys shoulda had guns. Sure woulda saved us some trouble."

Within a year of this JAC had his concealed carry license... I believe digger also aquired a rather substancial handgun in that same time frame.

To wrap up the loose ends... it turns out that the county already had these boy's asses in a sling. The big one... who was supposedly defending the honor of those two girls? Remember? The ones who were offended by our language?

Yeah... turns out... that girl he was with... the pretty one... who he ended up hittin' in the face... Well she was 14... and she was his niece. And he was going to jail for screwin' her repeatedly. They were all four either wanted, or out on bail, or parole.

You know... its funny how something like this effects ya. For years after this... and I mean years... I'd lay awake at night trying to figure out if I could've done anything better. I wondered if I'd just chickened out and froze up while my brothers were in the scrape of a life time.

I remember seein' JAC on his knees... gettin' pummeled by a guy twice his size... blind as a bat... but he's still holdin' on to that one dude's balls, and swingin' away with his free hand.

I remember Digger divin' in... damn the torpedos... he was gonna kill'em all bare handed.

It was all slow motion. It was over in seconds... and I was dazed as hell from the shot I took. What I remeber is pieced together from still, disjointed, timeless frames of memory. Why hadn't I sprinted for that car, jumped over it, and smashed somebody in the head?

I layed awake worrying about that... until I made up my mind that I would never let my guard down again. I made up my mind that I would never be caught in a fight that I didn't see coming. Lookin' back now... knowing what I know now... and with 14 years of experience and a few more fights under my belt... I realize that I really got clocked. I just wasn't there. If someone had been swinging at me, I'da had the instinct to defend myself... but in that situation... I couldn't see through the haze to make any sort of decision.

If you ever asked yourself... what creates Mr Prepared Super Self-Reliant fight till the last pump of his diein' heart som-bich like me?

Its the fear of failin' your kin.

I hope Digger and JAC blog on this... or tell their side of it here. Time and Distance change a lot of things... so the facts may not even be close to what I remember. Hell... I admit that I was in no sound state of mind. I ain't 100% sure I didn't get knocked out.

Anyway... I've rambled long enough... but I'll say one more thing.. I'm proud as hell of my brothers, and the way the handled themselves that night. JAC was double, and triple-teamed the whole time... he never backed down a damn bit. And Digger... hell... You can say a lot of bad things about Digger... You can say... He's uglier than a lop-eared pole cat... and he aint got no hair... and you can even say he's got a little pecker... But boys... You cain't say that' n cain't fight. I'll take him to war with me any day, provided he's on my side. He's meaner than a snake.

And that's that. All those sleepless nights... that sick feelin' in the stomach... That's what made me the freak you read about.

The fear of lettin' down your kin.

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